Surprise! Honestly, I would say I was also surprised to find out I was pregnant again but REALLY?! This is the fourth time – fifth if you count the chemical pregnancy right before Linc. I know how it happens. This is not that surprising.

It is a little bit surprising because I was using the lazy person’s birth control (breastfeeding) and hadn’t gotten my period back at all (sorry any dudes who happen to read this by accident) so it’s not like I was trying to get pregnant. I was just not NOT trying. The plan was always to give Linc a close sibling since it worked out so well for Evan and Caroline, but without a way to actually make that happen we just had our fingers crossed. I’m just very, very lucky. I’m very, very aware of that.

I realized I was pregnant at a game night with friends, when I drank half a glass of wine and immediately felt like throwing up. That is not at all my normal reaction to wine. I took a test that night when we got home and even though it wasn’t ideal testing conditions I got a super faint line. I woke up my (perhaps slightly drunk) husband to wave it in his face, but he swears his has no memory of that. The next day I tossed a digital test that said “PREGNANT” in his lap and that’s when he actually found out. I am not good at Big Gestures To Tell My Spouse. Not when I need him to immediately start handling all smelly house- and child-related issues.

I have what I think of as all the regular pregnacy symptoms – exhaustion, morning and evening sickness, constant peeing, sensitivity to smells, unexplained headaches I can’t take anything good for, pants that don’t fit. My face was breaking out like crazy for the first few weeks but it seems to be slightly better now. I spend every morning throwing up for 20 minutes but then I can usually power through until 3 or 4 pm when I have to start being careful to avoid triggers and then as long as I go to bed before 9 I’m mostly safe. Hopefully I’m almost past the morning sickness stage too and will get some of that good second trimester engergy, now that I’m in my second trimester.

Surprise again! I managed to not announce my pregnancy the second it happened, like I have previously done! I’m actually just slightly more than 14 weeks along, due at the end of August. This is the first time I’ve delayed talking about a pregnancy for so long, which felt a little weird. It started because I just didn’t want to announce at Christmas, then I didn’t want to announce until I had at least seen my OB but because I didn’t even call them until January my appointment wasn’t until the middle of the month. Then my standard screening test came back with some questionable results and I wanted all the information I could get before I opened myself up to every Facebook friend’s questions. Luckily the second, more accurate test came back normal and the ultrasound I had on Tuesday didn’t show anything concerning. I have another ultrasound at 19 weeks to triple check, but I feel reassured that things are as OK as you can ever say they are.Evan is SUPER excited. Caroline is excited about the idea of getting a sister. Linc doesn’t understand yet. Since I don’t want poor Caroline to spend the whole pregnancy thinking she’s getting a sister only to be disappointed at the hospital,

Evan is SUPER excited. Caroline is excited about the idea of getting a sister. Linc doesn’t understand yet. Since I don’t want poor Caroline to spend the whole pregnancy thinking she’s getting a sister only to be disappointed at the hospital, we’re going to find out what we’re having. Team Green was SUPER fun to do with Linc, but since this is mostly likely our last baby, having the next 5 months to purge baby clothes we won’t need is a good use of time. Just like I did a fancy announcement photo shoot, I have plans for a gender reveal photoshoots. It’s my LAST BABY. I want to do ALL the things. Imagine flower crowns and a sunset in my maternity photos.

Our families are very happy. My wonderful, fantastic, very understanding sister might have rearranged her wedding a tiny bit so I could still attend, which is one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me. E has been great. Honestly, I think he also realizes this is probably the LAST BABY and has stepped up – doing the dishes, putting the kids to bed, volunteering to hold my hair while I throw up, bringing me the food I’m craving, letting me lie on the couch and wallow while he vacuums. It is making being pregnant while also having three children much easier.

I’ve heard adding a fourth barely matters in the grand scheme of things. We already have a minivan. I’m already staying home with a toddler, staying home with a toddler and a baby only means I’m more tired, not a real change in my schedule. Linc might have just weaned himself (literally yesterday) because my supply has dropped, so I get a little break before I have to nurse a newborn. And then I’ll get a NEW BABY to wear in all my wraps and my baby carriers and snuggle and take pictures of and love undyingly forever and ever. We already scheduled the summer out so we still get to do our beach vacation, lake membership, camp for the kids AND I can spend all of August lying in 18 inches of kiddie pool water in our backyard so I don’t have to wear clothes.

I know myself too well to make any blogging promises, but I have high hopes that now that I’m not keeping my pregnancy a secret I’ll have a lot more stuff to say. I might even do some pregnancy style posts, since this is my LAST BABY and I need very little stuff so I might treat myself to a few cute things that are meant for people actually growing humans instead of just mashing myself into XXL tanks and yoga pants. Although, like I said, I am due in August, and there is no pregnancy style in August. Especially when you don’t have air conditioning.

Isn’t it completely crazy that I started this blog in 2008 when I was newly pregnant with Evan and only a month after I reach the 8 year mark I’ll have my FOURTH baby? That’s a lot of babies and a lot of time to maintain a blog, even if it’s just a personal narrative at this point and not the amazingly popular money-making mommy blogging empire I imagined in the first few years.

And I am INCREDIBLY happy about all of it.

I am so lucky that as part of my photography business here in Connecticut I’ve gotten to meet both lots of wonderful people and lots of wonderful photographers. My favorite might be Tiffany Joyce, who is a fellow Navy wife and crazy talented photographer based in Mystic. She came over for coffee a few weeks ago so we could talk about Making a Murder and I ended up asking her if she was interested in doing some updated family photos for us. She’s normally a wedding and engagement and couples session girl, but was kind enough for make an exception for my crazy family. Caroline LOVES Tiffany, probably because she has long blonde hair like a princess.

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Tiffany is also the best because she agreed to go with my insane photo ideas, even though it was clear from the start they were NOT going to work out like they do on Pinterest. E joked we were definitely going to end up on Pinterest Fails, next to those Cookie Monster cupcakes. Honestly, I have no idea why I even thought it was possible for balloons to float straight up outdoors but she did her best and I love these photos too:

What?

CLOSER.

And their faces when they figured out what the balloons were about:

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That’s as good as it’s gonna get, folks, pack up this circus and go home.

But don’t you dare ask the baby to walk up the hill! I promise he’s as excited as it’s possible for a 19-month-old to be about something he has literally no understanding of. I promise actual details coming soon!

Find Tiffany on Facebook and Instagram and hire her to photograph your wedding. Do it.

Apparently my friends think of me as some kind of Baby Expert, because now Sara has a question for me (and you) about how to help out when a friend has a second baby. Although since the closest Sara comes to babies is when she scowls at them in the street I guess I AM an expert by comparison. Ha ha, just kidding. Sara only scowls at babies in restaurants and elevators like all normal people.

Here’s the question:
So my cousin’s wife (We’ll call her M to make this easier) is having a baby next Tuesday. My cousin is the one who does my taxes, so I owe him, like, an enormous fruit basket or a kidney or something. They have an almost-four-year-old daughter. What can I offer to do to help? Make food? Take the older kid to the museum for a few hours? If you or your hordes of minions have suggestions for how to help out the second-time parents, I’d appreciate it.

Here’s my advice:
Take the older kid. Taker her far far far away. Take her to a museum and to lunch and to a big space where she can run around and burn off energy. An almost-four-year-old should be a fun date for half a day or so and M will definitely appreciate being able to rest – a newborn is CAKE compared to a toddler. Food is good too, but I would suggest a pizza gift card or a delivery of something like brownies or, well, a fruit basket instead of a frozen meal. Big casserole trays take up a lot of space and if M has done any pre-baby cooking herself her fridge and freezer might be full. You could, of course, call ahead and say “Don’t make dinner Tuesday, I’m bringing something over” and deliver a fresh made meal (or maybe have a nice local Chinese restaurant deliver a fresh made meal) because that saves on both the trouble of making dinner AND the sink full of making-dinner dishes – for some reason, dishes are the absolute hardest thing for me to stay on top of as a mother of 2. Even worse than laundry.

Here’s the important part: when you DO go over to deliver food/pick up their child/offer a kidney, DON’T STAY. Keep it to 2 minutes tops. Don’t sit on their couch, don’t use their bathroom, don’t stay for a meal, don’t so anything that would require M to feel the need to apologize for her unwashed dishes and dirty floors and sweatpants. As much as I loved having people stop by to visit I died a little inside every time the doorbell rang because of the state of my kitchen counters. They were SHAMEFUL. I was even more ashamed of my dirty kitchen than I was of wearing pajamas at 3 pm and no makeup and greasy hair – because what was I doing with my time if it wasn’t making myself presentable OR loading the dishwasher? I AM A LAZY FAILURE.

So. In short: help with the older kid. Drop off fruit basket. When you see M, say “You look so great! Your baby is adorable! Your toddler was SO well behaved at the museum! She clearly has awesome parents!”

Personally, I would find that even better than a kidney. And that’s coming from someone who could actually use one.

How about you, friends? What was the MOST HELPFUL thing someone did for you after having a baby?

Help my friend Erin put together a baby shower basket!

Like many of the childless who lurk among us, Erin needs a gift for a friend’s baby shower but has no idea what differentiates a nice baby shower gift from an AWESOME baby shower gift. Especially because, like so many first time parents, her friend forgot all her guests were NOT millionaires and filled her registry with things like $400 car seats. Or maybe Erin just forgot the first rule of baby showers, which is “Don’t wait til the last minute to buy something off a registry or you’ll end up being the person who brings the guest-of-honor 10 boxes of breast pads.” (True story. I was the guest-of-honor. 10 boxes of breast pads, all individually wrapped.)

So Erin needs our help. What sort of things did you get at your shower that maybe you didn’t actually register for but ended up being some of your favorites? Here are a few of my suggestions, feel free to add yours in the comments:

Vulli Sophie the Giraffe Teether. And every mom reading this just went “duh”. I was so reluctant to spend $20 on a stupid teething toy it took me MONTHS to break down and get a Sophie. Little Evan STILL loves it so much I’m going to have to buy another one for Caroline or there will be an epic battle.

Belly Button Book (Boynton on Board). So the baby might not be super interested in books for the first couple of months but once they are you need books that don’t drive you freaking crazy. Sandra Boynton books are perfect – short, cute, and pretty indestructible.

Pacifier clip from Hugs & Kisses Designs.  Not every kid is going to take a paci so this can be kind of a crap shoot, but it also works on those toys you’ve shoved into the baby’s stroller in a desperate attempt to keep them entertained while you run through Old Navy tossing random sized clothing into the basket so you’ll finally own something not covered in milk stains. Not that I’ve ever done that. But I can assure you it goes much faster when you’re not stopping every 30 seconds to pick those stupid interlocking rings up off the floor.

Koala Bear 4-Pack Receiving Blankets. I was going to put “four million burp cloths” on this list but decided receiving blankets made for a better presentation. I got a TON of these for my shower and thought “Really, who needs this many blankets?” But they are so USEFUL. They can be blankets, play mats, burp cloths, nursing covers, towels, and sun shades. I picked these because they’re gender neutral and cute but still really inexpensive. Feel free to buy the fancy, expensive kind but don’t be insulted if you catch the new mom using it to wipe baby puke off her jeans.

Ok folks, what would you suggest for Erin’s baby shower gift?

*The first two links are attached to my Amazon Associates account, so if you click through them to purchase I get approximately 4 cents commission. One of these days someone might actually do that, because so far I have made exactly zero cents. I don’t know why I even bother anymore.*