Posts Tagged ‘questions’

Toddler Interview: 21 Questions

Tuesday, August 21st, 2012

21 Toddler Interview Questions

I stole these from the adorable Krystal and her equally adorable daughter Marley. I’m assuming her interview involved a lot less trying to run away to go sit on the dog or watch trash trucks out the window. (I made up a joke for you. How can you tell if a 3-year-old has ADD? They’re breathing.) I might have better luck asking Caroline these questions, except her  answers would all be “Cheese!” Here’s the list of 21 Toddler Interview Questions I asked Evan:

1. What is something mommy always says to you? Mommy says “Yes”.

2. What makes you happy? Toys.

3. What makes you sad? Pointing makes me sad. Pointy things.

4. What makes you laugh? Helicopters make me laugh!

5. How old are you? Three.

6. How old is Mommy? Four! You are four.

7. How old is Daddy? Hmmm I don’t know. Daddies are…three.

8. What is your favorite thing to do? Walk, and the zoo. And when Mormor comes to the zoo with us! (Note: Mormor has never been to our zoo.)

9. Who is your best friend? Daddy.

10. What do you want to be when you grow up? Bigger.

11. What are you really good at? Putting things in Mr. Potato Head.

12. What are you not very good at? Using my words.

13. What did you do today? We went at the zoo. (Me: No we didn’t) We went at gymnastics. (Me: No we didn’t) We went to the park and saw my friends and went at Stroller Strides. Are we done yet?

14. What is your favorite food? Chicken and salad. And french fries with a toy and lemonade and a hamburger.

15. What is your favorite song? Music.

16. What do you want for your birthday this year? A castle and a basketball.

17. What is your favorite animal? Sharks and fishes.

18. What is love? Hmmm…I don’t know. Hugs?

19. What does daddy do for work? A boat. He goes on a boat.

20. Where do you live? I got it! In my house.

21. Where is your favorite place to go? The playground. Are we done now? I want to watch Octonauts.

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What’s In A Choice?

Tuesday, October 18th, 2011

Obviously, by now everyone has heard of Occupy Wall Street. The other day, a friend posted a link to this chart, which is a great summary of what OWS is about and why they feel that way.

I’m not going to talk about the movement itself, but I am interested in something my friend said in reference to the data in that chart: “…to say that more women {with children under the age of 18} work today because they have no choice and not because they like having a career in a society where it is acceptable and because discrimination has been drastically reduced is silly.”

And my immediate response was: Well yes. But also no. And definitely. But really not at all. Why do women work? Or more specifically, why do MOTHERS work?  Can there possibly be a more complicated question?

The stickiest part of my friend’s statement is “no choice”, isn’t it? On the one hand, yah for feminism and the opportunity to have careers outside the home that aren’t just placeholders until we can snag a husband! On the other hand, pretending your cashier at Target would rather be making $8 an hour ringing up your face cream and Funions instead of at home with her own kid is bullshit.

I know plenty of moms who love their jobs, love their work, love having adult conversations around the water cooler about The Real Housewives of Wherever but who would quit and stay home with their kids in a HEARTBEAT if they suddenly won the lottery and could never work another day in their life. I also know that if childcare was free and I could have any job I wanted in the whole world I would absolutely leave my kids to be raised by strangers (said in your best judgy voice) a few days a week while I trained dolphins at Sea World (hey, sometimes your dream at 6 years old is STILL YOUR DREAM).

But real life doesn’t give everyone those options. If you’re a single mom? You have no choice. In a lot of cities there is no way to support a family on one income. Sometimes your partner gets laid off. Or maybe their job doesn’t offer health insurance. Or maybe they’re in school pursuing their dream and you’re supporting them – so you have no choice but to work to put food on the table but it is BY choice that you have chosen that choice.

There are days where my choice to stay home doesn’t even feel like a choice. SOMEONE has to watch these kids and we can’t afford a nanny. I mean really, if I had my CHOICE I’d spend one day a week at the spa getting massages and drinking cocktails so I could be the super calm, zen-like mother I aspire to be.

I don’t think “why women work” is something that can be measured or put in a pie chart or even summed up in a sentence. There is no box on a questionnaire that says “all and also none of the above” so using it as part of a your political movement can be tricky. I think the only thing you could get everyone to agree to would be that in an ideal world all women could make the choice they WANTED to make and not the choice they had to make.

So, why do you/do you not work?

Here’s my answer – I always planned to be a stay-at-home-mom eventually. We are able to afford it right now. I became a military spouse right after college and never established a career I would have wanted to go back to post-kids and I haven’t found anything I can do from home (besides blogging, obviously, which doesn’t exactly lead to BUCKETS OF MONEY.) So I think it is about 80% by choice and 20% not by choice although that’s the least scientific percentage ever.

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Friday, January 28th, 2011

Apparently my friends think of me as some kind of Baby Expert, because now Sara has a question for me (and you) about how to help out when a friend has a second baby. Although since the closest Sara comes to babies is when she scowls at them in the street I guess I AM an expert by comparison. Ha ha, just kidding. Sara only scowls at babies in restaurants and elevators like all normal people.

Here’s the question:
So my cousin’s wife (We’ll call her M to make this easier) is having a baby next Tuesday. My cousin is the one who does my taxes, so I owe him, like, an enormous fruit basket or a kidney or something. They have an almost-four-year-old daughter. What can I offer to do to help? Make food? Take the older kid to the museum for a few hours? If you or your hordes of minions have suggestions for how to help out the second-time parents, I’d appreciate it.

Here’s my advice:
Take the older kid. Taker her far far far away. Take her to a museum and to lunch and to a big space where she can run around and burn off energy. An almost-four-year-old should be a fun date for half a day or so and M will definitely appreciate being able to rest – a newborn is CAKE compared to a toddler. Food is good too, but I would suggest a pizza gift card or a delivery of something like brownies or, well, a fruit basket instead of a frozen meal. Big casserole trays take up a lot of space and if M has done any pre-baby cooking herself her fridge and freezer might be full. You could, of course, call ahead and say “Don’t make dinner Tuesday, I’m bringing something over” and deliver a fresh made meal (or maybe have a nice local Chinese restaurant deliver a fresh made meal) because that saves on both the trouble of making dinner AND the sink full of making-dinner dishes – for some reason, dishes are the absolute hardest thing for me to stay on top of as a mother of 2. Even worse than laundry.

Here’s the important part: when you DO go over to deliver food/pick up their child/offer a kidney, DON’T STAY. Keep it to 2 minutes tops. Don’t sit on their couch, don’t use their bathroom, don’t stay for a meal, don’t so anything that would require M to feel the need to apologize for her unwashed dishes and dirty floors and sweatpants. As much as I loved having people stop by to visit I died a little inside every time the doorbell rang because of the state of my kitchen counters. They were SHAMEFUL. I was even more ashamed of my dirty kitchen than I was of wearing pajamas at 3 pm and no makeup and greasy hair – because what was I doing with my time if it wasn’t making myself presentable OR loading the dishwasher? I AM A LAZY FAILURE.

So. In short: help with the older kid. Drop off fruit basket. When you see M, say “You look so great! Your baby is adorable! Your toddler was SO well behaved at the museum! She clearly has awesome parents!”

Personally, I would find that even better than a kidney. And that’s coming from someone who could actually use one.

How about you, friends? What was the MOST HELPFUL thing someone did for you after having a baby?

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FAQs that make me want to say MYOB

Thursday, June 3rd, 2010

Is my inner Navy Wife showing yet? You know how we love our acronyms.

As a public service announcement, and to save myself a tiny bit of sanity, here are the answers to the questions I get most often when someone finds out I’m pregnant.

Oh wow, AGAIN?
No, actually, this is the first time. Baby Evan was delivered by stork. Yes, again.

Did you want to have kids so close together?
Short answer, yes. Long answer, at least the first two. We want our kids – who are destined to the nomadic life of military brats – to have at least one built in playmate.

So were you trying?
Really? Think about what you’re asking me. Do you really want to know the answer to this question? It is not a yes or no – it involves detailed descriptions of my menstrual cycle and marital relations and this one week where…wait, where are you going?! You asked!

Are you hoping for a girl?
Meh. Either way. I already have all the boy stuff and a pretty good idea what to do with one.

You must want a girl for all those cute girl clothes!
They are very cute and I will admit to squeeing over them more than once in the stores, but dressing a baby is only a one teeny tiny part of your day. And I know plenty of girls I can shop for if I want.

Do you want a girl so you can have one for your husband and one for you?
If this baby is “for my husband” then I’ve clearly been doing this wrong. Hey honey! Come get your baby! Apparently he’s not really mine because he has a penis!

Do you want a girl so then you can be done having kids?
It’s not like once you get one of each you have the whole set. They’re kids, not bookends.

Are you trying to have them all before your turn 30?
Why, is that the magical age my uterus turns into a pumpkin? This is just a good point in our lives to have kids – E isn’t deployed, I’m already home with Baby Evan, I have a great support network, and we have room for another crib. If all that stuff hadn’t lined up until I was 32 or 35 or 45 we’d probably still be childless.

Oh. So how many are you going to have?
Well our ultimate plan is to start a traveling circus so I guess I’ll keep having kids until we get one that’s double jointed, one that’s freakishly tall and one bearded lady. Or maybe we’ll just see what happens.

End public service announcement. Continue to ask above questions at your own risk.

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