This is the last month my baby will be my baby. I’ve been letting myself say she’s “one” for the past couple weeks instead of “almost 2”, even though it feels sort of ridiculous. She’s been shedding her babyhood faster than I can gather it up in my memory for more than a year now. Recently she’s moved farther away from charming, silly and good-natured and more towards willful, stubborn and independent.  She’s mostly capable of doing things on her own but has very strong opinions about WHEN and WHERE she wants to do them. It’s like a tiny window into what it will be like to have a 16 year old. It doesn’t help that she’s been having physical and emotional growing pains that frustrate both of us immensely and leave me wrung out by bedtime.

And then, on Saturday night, right as I was leaving her room after an hour of stories and rocking and singing and cajoling and begging her to please, please, please just lie in your bed and sleep already she said “Rock Mommy, rock”. I held her in my lap and we rocked. I felt her go limp and still then twitchy and dreaming and tried to remember the last time we rocked to sleep. I couldn’t. I know the last time  she couldn’t have asked so clearly. I know the last time her feet didn’t hang off the chair and I couldn’t rest my chin on her head. And then I lifted her full sleeping body weight to put her into bed and all of her babyness dropped away. She is long and heavy and definitely a child, even if I’m not completely ready for her to be one.

Two seems like it’s going to be a challenge. Along with learning to say adorable things like “Oh coconuts!” and “Don’t whorry, Mommy!” she loves to yell “I DO IT!” and “EAT! EAT! EAT! NOW!” and “Jammies on, NO BATH!” For every spontaneous please and thank you there’s a screaming fit over wearing shoes or pants. I keep telling myself it’s just a phase – it’s ALWAYS just a phase – but right now I’m just hoping we both survive it with no permanent damage.

It the face of her epic tantrums, it’s a good thing she’s really, really cute. She loves to narrate what we’re doing, so at Target she sounds like this: “Target! I love you Target! Cart. No that cart. Big cart! I DO IT. I push. Caroline walking. See! C’mon Mommy! Coffee, Mommy? Coffee? Icee? Hi! Hi baby! Hi! No, my cart! Buy it Mommy? I have it. HAVE IT NOW. Yahhhhh Target! Bye bye bye bye Target! Bye!” times one thousand times a day. She picks out her own clothes and if that means she wears a short summer PJ’s over footie PJ’s then that’s OK with me, although it’s cold enough now that I keep getting Looks when we go into a store and she isn’t wearing shoes. She eats more than anyone else in the house but is still a peanut. She’s really into coloring and painting now, although the mess she makes is incredible. But that’s the part she likes the best so clever toddler-friendly alternatives like Color Wonder markers don’t fool her one bit. She wants me to read to her 12 hours a day, although she also likes to “read” her own books. Yesterday she tried to play Twinkle Twinkle Little Star on the piano, although I only know that’s what she was playing because she was also singing at the top of her lungs. I wish she would let me put a barrette in her hair to keep her bangs out of her eyes but there is no way I am cutting a single hair on her head.

Likes include her blankies (she calls them both “Bee”), her pillow, books, blocks, music boxes, CHRISTMAS STUFF, art, making a mess, Sesame Street, music, dancing, gymnastics, putting on clothes, taking off clothes, running, cuddles, iPads, iPhones, Daddy, the dog, the cat, singing, climbing stairs, her brother, doing things herself, bossing me around, Mickey Mouse, apples, eggs, eating and giving kisses.

Dislikes helping me run errands, being left behind, not getting her way, wearing shoes, and bedtime.

Milestones below the adorable photos, as usual.

23 Month Milestones (from BabyCenter, as usual)

Mastered Skills (most kids can do)
Names simple picture in a book – She can name almost anything in a book and insists on doing it every time we read anything.
Uses 50 to 70 words – More like 500 to 700 words and that is only a tiny exaggeration. She knows ALL THE WORDS.

Emerging Skills (half of kids can do)
Opens doors – She can, but she’s mostly too short for the ones in our house. THANK GOD.
Sings simple tunes – Yesterday she tried to play Twinkle Twinkle on the piano while singing. It was a nice effort but she is clearly not a musical prodigy.
Takes more of an interest in playing with other kids – Was she supposed to be uninterested in other kids? She’s a second child, the poor girl has no idea how to entertain herself.

Advanced Skills (a few kids can do)
Talks about self (likes, dislikes) – Mostly dislikes. “NO WANT IT BERRIES! WANT MOMMY’S FOOD.” “Nooooo bathtime! Nooooo NOT filthy!” but she will tell you her favorite color is green and she likes her blankie.
Asks “why?” – No, but she asks “HUH?” and taps her finger on her chin and says “Ummmmmm” while she’s thinking.

This might be one of the braggiest braggy monthday updates ever. Just warning you. I don’t feel bad or anything.

Caroline is 19 months and she can name pictures in books (kitty, mommy, milk, cow) which is listed as an Advanced Skill for 21 month olds. She already sleeps in a big girl bed, which is an Advanced Skill for 22 month olds. She can walk down stairs – an Emerging Skill at 24 months – by herself if it’s only 3 or 4 stairs or with a handrail, if she’s tall enough to reach it (mostly, she’s not, so she holds my hand). She can jump with both feet off the ground, which isn’t even ON this chart – it’s listed on the 25-30 months chart. And if yelling “JUMP!” as she throws herself off the couch and “WALK!” when I’m carrying her and she wants to get down (“DOWN!”) counts, she can “Name two actions (e.g., skipping, jumping)”, a skill not listed until 36 months.

She’s really freaking smart, is what I’m saying. And it’s not all good. Her new favorite word is “no”, which she says even when she means yes. I started counting with her (“Caroline! Stop running away from me. I’m going to count to three!”) and instead of listening she yells “THREE!” and runs faster. I’m just lucky she’s still too short to reach the doorknobs so I can trap contain keep her in her room for naps. Toddlers are like velociraptors – they’re only REALLY dangerous once they can open doors.

I forgot to bring her record book to her 18 month appointment so I don’t remember the exact numbers, but she was about 21 pounds which still puts her in the 25th percentile. She fell to the 15th percentile in height, but instead of freaking out the way the doctor did when Evan dropped to a lower curve, the doc just said “Meh, put peanut butter on her apples.” Which is good, since “AP-PULL!” is her new favorite food (again). She also loves every other kind of fruit, carrots, peas picked from our garden, anything she can dip in hummus and Wheat Thins. She pretty much loves food in general, which makes me a happy mama – no fighting to get calories into her and worrying the doctor is going to order more weight checks.

Her favorite place is the aquarium (although the zoo is a close second) where she presses her entire body up against the glass and screams “FIIIIIIIIIIIIISH! FISH! FISH!” She will sit through the entire sea lion show and is happy to touch the sharks and stingrays and crabs in the touch tanks. I cannot even tell you how much I love that she loves the aquarium. It feels like I somehow passes a piece of my heart and brain to her as well as my genetic code.

Other likes include dogs, kitties, books, turtles, climbing, slides, water of all kinds, nudity, juice, cheese, apples, talking, shouting, screeching, running, stairs, the potty, beds, fruit snacks, fist bumps, boats, fire trucks, her dolly, dancing, music, babies and hugs.

Dislikes include falling down, being hungry, letting me look in her mouth, missing out on fun things, when her brother puts a pillow over her face and sits on it.

Baby pool? I don’t need no stinkin’ baby pool.

Oh hai, is this a problem?

NOW is it a problem?

Man I love testing limits! So fun!

I’m too cute for you to stay mad.

LACE. ROMPER.

She’s thinking about jumping

Accessorizing!

Heartbreaker

Posing for her Senior Portrait

The many faces of Caroline

19 Month Milestones (from BabyCenter, as usual)

Mastered Skills (most kids can do)
Uses a spoon and fork – Prefers forks, but can use both.
Runs – SO FAST.
Throws a ball underhand – She got E RIGHT in the face with a ball the other day. I laughed because I’m a bad person, but I should probably be signing her up for softball.
Enjoys helping around the house – You guys, I think she does more chores than I do. She loves helping and I am not adverse to letting her.

Emerging Skills (half of kids can do)
Understands as many as 200 words – Understands ALL THE WORDS. She even understands sarcasm. Obviously she’s my daughter. She also SAYS at least 75 words – her newest skill is words with more than one syllable.
Recognizes when something is wrong (e.g., calling a dog a cat) – I’m sure she WOULD but that seems like kind of a mean game.

Advanced Skills (a few kids can do)
Washes and dries own hands with help – Washes hands all freaking day if I’d let her,
Points to picture or object when you call it by name – We just played a game of this in while hanging out in front of the open fridge. She got: yogurt, milk, juice, cheese, grapes and beer.
May know when she needs to pee – Can pee and poop in the potty but also just thinks using the bathroom is REALLY COOL so she wants to do it all the time. I’m not going to work on actual potty training for a couple more months, unless she does it entirely on her own.

I think it’s insane that Caroline is only 17 months old but I give her almost as much independence as her 3 year old brother. She’s allowed to sit in full sized chairs, climb the stairs, walk next to the cart at the store, help with chores, play in the other room by herself, eat grown up food and take a book to bed without my worrying she’ll rip it up. I’d say it’s about 75% thanks to my second-child-fend-for-yourself attitude and 25% thanks to her really-smart-and-capable attitude. No matter what the cause it makes doing stuff with her a zillion times easier than they were with Evan at this age. Not that Evan was BAD, but he was still my BABY. Caroline wants to know if she can borrow the car this weekend.

Her favorite games are Dinosaur Attack Baby, Tickle Tickle Your Face With Her Razor Sharp Nails, Push Me On The Swing Until Your Arm Falls Off, Terrorize The Cat, Hug The Cat, Terrorize The Cat Again, Try On All The Hats, Eat $12 Worth Of Fruit, and Get Naked.

She still takes one long afternoon nap and sleeps about 12 hours a night. She will take a nap even if she falls asleep in the car on the way home, which means I don’t have to sing VERY LOUDLY to keep her awake – although sometimes I just like to sing very loudly. It’s better than another round of Who Can Scream Loudest because NO ONE WINS. She eats almost any fruit, about half the vegetables, and ALL the carbs. She’s still in 12 or 18 month clothes, size 4 shoes and size 4 diapers. Her hair is still more of an auburn than her brother’s strawberry blond and it’s getting a little curly in the back. I am THRILLED.

Likes include hats, animals, swinging, ducks, running, cheese, fruit snacks, slides, brushing her teeth, playing in the garden, her dolly, shoes, anything that looks like a cell phone, her new car seat, water, jumping, somersaults, books, The Fresh Beat Band, sleeping, taking off her clothes, and Daddy.

Dislikes include raspberries, diaper rash, being hungry, loud trucks, and people who don’t share.

I am super jealous of her eyelashes.

WTF is this nonsense? Cinderella was a CHUMP.

I refuse to stop eating long enough for you to take this picture.

Ginger

ROAR!

Happy 17th birthday I mean MONTHDAY Caroline

17 Month Milestones (from BabyCenter, as usual)

Mastered Skills (most kids can do)
Uses six words regularly – Mommy, Daddy, hi, kitty, doggy, quack-quack, roar, hat, fish, yes, cheese and shoes are all clear enough to be understood by other people. Then she has an entire babble-sign-arm-waving language for me.
Enjoys pretend games – Pretend cooks, pretend takes care of her baby and pretends to listen to me.
Likes riding toys – She’ll straight up tricycle-jack your kid at the playground.

Emerging Skills (half of kids can do)
Feeds doll – She rubbed an entire squeeze pouch of baby food onto her doll’s face.
Speaks more clearly – Do I need to speak more clearly? I think I answered that one BABY CENTER.
Throws a ball underhand – Sure, but she’s much better at hockey.

Advanced Skills (a few kids can do)
Dances to music – Sometimes, unless it’s the Fresh Beat Band and then it’s ALWAYS.
Sorts toys by color, shape, or size – I know she knows “blue”, does that count?
Kicks ball forward – Like I said, she’s better with a stick.

A summary of Caroline at 13 months…

What she ate: Mini-waffles, grapes (red and green), Pirate’s Booty, grilled cheese, Goldfish, blueberries, carrots, pretzels, yogurt melts, string cheese, lollipop, watered down juice, boob, and a clementine although she really just sucked the juice out and left gross slimy sections all over the floor.

What she wore: Size 4 diaper, size 4 Mary Janes, white socks, 12 month leggings and dress she ruined by crushing blueberries with her butt, 12-18 month jeggings, shirt and sweater I bought at Old Navy to replace ruined leggings and dress. Adorable smile.

What she did: Went to Stroller Strides, ate from a snack trap, played in the play area, climbed up the stairs and down the slide by herself, made new friends, went to a playdate, stood on a chair, fell on her face several times, learned to climb into a chair correctly, clapped, said “all done” when I asked if she was all done nursing, made me laugh, ran away, gave kisses, tried to eat a lot of inappropriate  items, played peek a boo, watched Toy Story, took a nap in my lap, cried a little bit, hugged her daddy, went to sleep without an argument.

Likes include running, climbing, smiling, clapping, laughing, taking off her shoes, blueberries, her brother, friends, being upside down, tunnels, slides, making important calls on her (my) cell phone, tea parties, trying to kill herself.

Disliked include falling on her head, when people try to help her after she falls on her head, being told not to fall on her head, eating clementines the right way.

I’m out of monthly stickers and Caroline refuses to hold still or pose for pictures so these are…blurry. That’s a nice word.

She takes her sandwiches very seriously

She is SO blogging this playdate

Wassup Red?

Finally sitting in the chair without giving anyone a heart attack

TINY JEGGINGS

Lap nap after a busy day

Dinner of champions

13 Month Milestones (from BabyCenter, as usual)

Mastered Skills (most kids can do)
Uses two words skillfully (e.g., “hi” and “bye”) – She can say mama, daddy, kitty, doggie, hi, all done, and sit
Bends over and picks up an object – Yes, especially if it’s food

Emerging Skills (half of kids can do)
Enjoys gazing at his reflection – She will kiss the baby in the mirror but she loses interest pretty quickly. There are lots of things that need kissing.
Holds out arm or leg to help you dress him – She CAN, although she thinks pulling a shirt over her head is some sort of baby torture. But she can take her clothes off like a…nope, can’t bring myself to make any analogy here.

Advanced Skills (a few kids can do)
Combines words and gestures to make needs known – Does weeping and yanking on my pants while I’m trying to eat my lunch without sharing count? How about weeping and yanking on my pants while I read to her brother? Or weeping and yanking on my pants because it’s only 71 degrees in the play room and she prefers it at 73? SHE HAS A LOT OF NEEDS.
Rolls a ball back and forth – Y……es? I feel like Evan was super into balls at this age but Caroline is too busy climbing on stuff and pushing cars around. I’ll see if she wants to play tomorrow.

This is it, I’m done. I refuse to do any more monthday posts for Caroline because I refuse to let her get any older. Nine months is GOOD. She can stay this age FOREVER AND EVER and I will be a happy mama. Because 9 months? It rocks my socks. She can crawl and cruise but not walk or run away, she nurses a lot but not constantly, she’s happy and smiley and social and friendly but she still loves me best. Her clothes are tiny and cute and it’s easy to dress her in anything I want, including dainty lacy vintage jumpers* because she doesn’t immediately throw up on herself of poopsplode immediately! If I let her get any older she’s going to start developing opinions and ideas and then it’s all over.

Tooth count: two middle bottom ones, one top front through and the other top front is about to make an appearance but not before it turns her into the saddest, snottiest, most sleepless baby EVER. I have been beyond exhausted with the not sleeping plus the sad daytime crying but she’s been eating a lot more solids (and by solids I mean eating whatever her brother drops on the floor as he wanders around – yesterday it was a half peeled clementine)(I wish I was joking) and we’re moving her from our room to her nursery this week so I’m hoping to get at least 6 hours every night this week. Whoa! Six whole hours! I’m aiming for the stars here, people!!

Caroline has moved up to 6-12 month clothes from Old Navy, 6-9 month clothes from Gymboree, 9 month clothes from Target and 9 month clothes from Carter’s, unless they are overalls because then they’re just comically long. You know what else is comical? The fact that the math section of my brain is now full of the sizing info for various baby brands instead of algebra. This is what happens when you have kids, kids. Stay in school.

We have a doctor’s appointment….uh…maybe today? Or tomorrow? I should check on that, since when they start asking questions – How often does she eat? Is she vocalizing at all? Do you have any concerns? – and I just stare at them blankly they’re already going to doubt my parenting skills. I don’t want to show up on the wrong day as well. I’m looking forward to seeing how much she’s grown, although she still seems teeny tiny compared to Little Evan. She is going to be my little peanut, my munchkin, my ginger baby doll forever and ever, even if she DOES get older next month.

Caroline’s likes include: cheese, the dog, her brother, blankies, crawling with one leg, smiling, grapes, biting things, boobs, her daddy, standing, apples, yarn, and eating trash. Dislikes are having her nails trimmed, water on her face, loneliness, her crib, and Dino Dan.

Hold on to your ovaries folks, these are the cutest monthday photos yet!

Bebeh model works on her posing

Eeeeexellent

9 Month Milestones (from BabyCenter, as usual)

Mastered Skills (most kids can do)
Stands while holding onto something – Yes, especially my pants while I am trying to sit on the toilet for two damn minutes.
Jabbers or combines syllables – She’s a noisy little monster, but so far it’s just blah blah blah blah.
Understands object permanence – Yes. It makes peek-a-boo fun, but it also means she knows if she screams long enough I’ll come back during nap time. A win AND a lose.

Emerging Skills (half of kids can do)
Cruises while holding onto furniture – Yes, the better to steal my snacks and the remote off the couch
Drinks from a sippy cup – Soooort of. She LOVES her brother’s sippy cup but is unexcited by anything coming out of it. I tried giving her breastmilk and she looked at me like WTF WOMAN THIS IS NOT A BOOB.
Eats with fingers – Well, I think she mostly eats with her mouth, but she certainly gets enough food on her hands.
Bangs objects together – Loudly. She needs more cowbell.

Advanced Skills (a few kids can do)
Plays patty-cake and peek-a-boo – If there was a peek-a-boo championship, she would get the gold medal.
Says “mama” or “dada” to the correct parent – I have heard no mama’s. It took Little Evan more than a year to say mama so we’ll give her a break too.

*Dainty lacy vintage jumper and headband send by Pretty Fancy. Heather is a sweetheart with an adorable bebeh!

Just pretend that's a happy laughing face.