I have found the first food that my baby absolutely hates and that food is…fudge. Really, tadpole? That’s the food you refuse to accept in my body? Fresh, delicious, homemade fudge? I just wish you would have warned me before I bought two pounds of the stuff at Mystic Seaport this weekend.

You know how when you’re really hungover and you feel like total crap and you know it would be soooo much better if you just threw up so you stop fighting it and get all that leftover alcohol and stomach bile and late night fast food out of your system and then you can finally get up off the floor and find some greasy eggs and hash browns?

Yeah, morning sickness is nothing like that.

I am currently basing all my food choices on how uncomfortable they are when they come back up.

…that some things hurt A LOT more when you’re pregnant? (This may also explain my last eyebrow wax.) I had my 6 month cleaning at the dentist today. I was very very proud of myself for not throwing up on my hygienist, even with the PAIN. I know she was trying to be gentle, but it felt like she was stabbing my mouth with razor blades and my gums bled so much I looked like a vampire. It was decidedly not fun. Maybe this is nature’s way of building up my pain tolerance so that the…thing that’s going to happen in 7 months doesn’t hurt OHMIGODSOFRICKINMUCH. Do you think I could talk my doctor into starting my epidural now?

I’m definitely having a baby! Just one though, which goes to show exactly how lousy my intuition about everything related to my uterus is. I got mostly good news but a little less good news at my first real appointment.

Good: Yes, I am pregnant. The baby is where it is supposed to be and it has a strong heartbeat. The doctor liked my answers to all the health questions and reassured me that I’ve been doing everything right. The very kind nurse didn’t make me look at the scale and assured me I weighed “Exactly 120, just like you thought” (Obviously a joke, I haven’t weighed 120 in a million years). The doctor was also very nice and reminded me of my aunt, but there’s only a 1 in 7 chance she’ll actually deliver my baby. My next appointment is September 19th, only 3 days after Evan’s promotion ceremony, so the time between now and then should go very quickly. I thought the whole hearing the baby’s heartbeat thing would have been more dramatic, but when you’ve got a probe shoved up your hoohoo it’s hard to concentrate.

Not so good: I’m not as pregnant as I thought. Based on the size of the baby (less than a centimeter!) I’m only at about 7 weeks. I just lost 2 whole weeks!! My new due date is April 1st, which is pushing awfully close to my own April 10th birthday. It also explains why I wasn’t having symptoms, and means I’ve got 5 more weeks of feeling like crap until I’m out of the first trimester. Also not so good is my blood test showed I am Rh-negative. I read the little pamphlet they gave me and still can’t keep it all straight, but basically it means my body might attack the fetus if the baby is Rh-positive. The doctor can prevent most issues with a shot at 28 weeks and another after the birth (ugh, not thinking about that part yet), and if the baby is also Rh-negative there is no issue at all. I also learned my blood type: 0 negative! Can you believe I’m 26 and I never knew? I feel so guilty for not donating blood in the past, what with my super universal donor status.

Below are my ultrasound pictures. I’m posting them more out of obligation than anything else because even though it is my own baby, I still think they’re a little boring. Oh look, a blob. Hopefully at my next ultrasound in November there will be more to see, and we can find out if baby (as E said) has a hamburger or a hot dog. Is it wrong that now I’m really hungry?

So tomorrow at 9:30 am is my first actual doctor’s appointment! I can’t believe the doctor has trusted me to do this on my own for so long. Shouldn’t I have some sort of degree or license in order to grow people? I am both incredibly excited and terrified about my ultrasound. I need to see a heartbeat before I can believe this is real, but on the other hand I’m scared they’ll find something wrong or give me bad news and I don’t know how to handle that. I have this deep deep down super secret feeling that one of the reasons my morning sickness and symptoms have gotten so bad so fast is because there’s more that one baby. I have no real reason for thinking that and will regret saying it out loud after tomorrow, but I just…want it to be true. Although as long as there is one complete happy baby I will be dancing through the streets tomorrow. Update as soon as I get one, I promise!