I was daydreaming through the Pottery Barn catalog a few weeks ago and I noticed a solid black globe with chalk writing on it (of course, now that I want to show you I can’t find it online). What is it with PB and their obsession with chalkboard paint? Don’t they realize any idiot can just buy a can of that stuff and paint things with it instead of spending hundreds of dollars on the ones from the catalog? Although I guess the kinds of people who order entire rooms straight from Pottery Barn are too busy playing tennis and vacationing on Martha’s Vineyard and rolling in hundred dollar bills to bother buying paint. So it’s left to people like me to write chalkboard tray and chalkboard globe tutorials. I even fancied the globe up a bit to make it more fun.

I am the wordiest, most rambling blogger ever, so to make this easier on people just looking for a tutorial all the REALLY important parts are in bold.

Materials:
Globe
Chalkboard paint
Contact paper
Scissors
Paintbrush
Printer and paper (optional)

I actually own 6 (SIX!) old, inaccurate globes in various stages of deterioration. I used the worst of them for this project, since the other ones are kind of cool. But as my mother pointed out, globes are some of the most useless dust catchers ever so don’t feel too bad about painting over one. Especially one that still says “U.S.S.R.”

Also on this globe: East/West Germany and Burma

Although you can tell it’s not THAT old because Burkina Faso is called Burkina Faso and not Upper Volta (it was changed in 1984).

She's in the Peace Corps

Instead of covering the whole globe with black paint and then drawing my own world on it (which would also be super cute) I decided to try leaving some of the map showing through. For my first globe I used my son’s name:

I tried printing it directly onto make-your-own sticker paper (also known as 8 1/2 x 11 shipping label paper from Staples). This didn’t work out so well, as you’ll see that in a minute. Then I cut out the letters and stuck them on the globe.

Unfortunately, when I painted over the letters, the sticker paper absorbed the paint…

…So when I tried to peel the stickers off the top layer came up but the adhesive stuck to the globe.

Using several different kinds of knives (a regular old table knife ended up working best) I managed to scrape MOST of it off and only damaged the map underneath in a couple of places. I figured this was my trial run – and the globe I’m going to let my toddler play with – so it’s not the end of the world. Ahahaha! Globe joke!!

Luckily I was able to try again.

This one was in even worse shape - the equator is held together with scotch tape

Globe #2 is missing it’s little time zone circle disk, which meant I didn’t have to take it off the stand to paint all the way to the top. (Globe #1 popped right off the stand but I discovered it’s way easier to paint most of it while it’s still on it. Less rolling!)

Here’s the way this project actually works best: I used contact paper I found at Target to make stickers. It was with the shelf paper that comes in cute patterns (on the aisle with the mops) but I picked the most basic clear kind to ensure it was just one layer and wouldn’t come apart like the label paper. I printed out the word “LOVE” with a heart for the “O” on regular paper, then traced it backwards onto the paper side of the contact paper. That way when you peel the paper off and stick it on the globe the letters face the right way.

Then I painted it with two coats of the chalkboard paint…

…and peeled off the contact paper to see the map underneath!

Now my useless dust collectors are cuter, chalkboard dust collectors.

Here are the tips I have to make this as easy as possible:
1. Choose a font or shape that doesn’t require a ton of detailed cutting. I couldn’t even get the center part of the “A” in Evan to come out right, which is why it’s not there. Besides, you want big sections of the map to show through.
2. Don’t make your shapes/letters too large or the contact paper won’t lie flat when you stick it to the globe. It’s important to get the edges stuck down really well to prevent the paint from seeping underneath.
3. When the paint DOES get under the contact paper, you can veeeeery gently scrape it off with a blade or craft knife. It’s easiest if you do it as soon as possible, so peel the stickers off as soon as the paint is dry(ish).
4. Be sure to follow the instructions for dry-time on the chalkboard paint before you try using chalk on it, or you’ll end up with permanent marks. They’re not joking about that.
5. I bought all my globes for mere dollars at our local flea market, which is kind of a lousy flea market but apparently a gold mine for old globes. I’ve also seen them at antique stores but those tend to be a little pricier because they’re in better condition or actual antiques instead of junk. Shipping a globe is cost prohibitive, so your best bet is garage or yard sales or a trashy flea market in your area. Just keep your eyes open!

Other cool ideas – just paint the ocean or the continents with chalkboard paint so you can color in the rest however you want. Get really ambitious and outline the continents in another color. Use painter’s tape to make stripes and then write cute, clever things all around the world. Your creativity is only limited by your access to cheap globes!

But hey, even if you end up paying $30 for one at an antique store that’s still a LOT cheaper than $297.50. Yikes.

Heeeeeeeere's Evan!

I’m sorry, but the caption was absolutely essential. I almost fell over laughing when I saw his face.

After trips to three different real furniture stores and a few half-hearted searches on our local Craigslist we ended up buying a twin sized bed for Little Evan at Ikea. I don’t know why we even bothered looking anywhere else when the bed I had pictured in my mind was clearly modern, minimalist and Swedish while all the furniture at the traditional stores was heavy and tall and wooden. The salesman at our local store tried to convince me we shouldn’t get a twin bed at all, because eventually he’d need a full sized bed anyways so why not buy one now? Along with the matching dresser? And hey, how about this $400 mattress too? I tried to point out that 99% of college students I know sleep in twin sized beds so Little Evan’s “need” for a full sized bed was sort of subjective single bed with tv. Besides, my little 27 lb toddler still fits just fine in his crib. It’s not like he needs the space of a full. Heck, I can lie in the twin WITH him and we both fit fine. So basically, I told the salesman to shove it (politely) and we went to Ikea. Besides, I had already ordered super cute sheets from Garnet Hill in twin and I hate returning things. Flawless logic, that.

We bought this bed:

ODDA bedframe with drawers

I love that it’s low enough for him to climb in and out himself and the extra storage space underneath. You can NEVER have enough places to hide toys and stuffed animals. So we bought the bed frame and the least expensive mattress they sell (my theory is between now and full potty training it’s going to get so gross we’ll end up tossing it anyways) and E swore his way through their wordless Swedish instructions and now it’s all set up and ready for Little Evan to start sleeping in it. Which is going…not so well.

Sunday night he lay on the bed but asked to sleep in the crib when it was time to turn the lights out. But for Monday nap time he climbed right up, lay down, asked for his milk and and kiss and told me night-night. I tucked him in, made sure he had his eight zillion different blankets and stuffed animals and left the room.

I listened outside the door. All was quiet. I came downstairs and listened over the monitor. I could hear him babbling a little and rustling his sheets. Then there was complete silence and I did a little happy dance of joy.

I texted E to tell him how I was AWESOME and that our kid was a big-boy bed genius and that when he got home we could totally take the crib apart for good because who needs it?! I made plans to hem curtains and move bookcases and blog the awesome new toddler room because the redecorating was totally going to be done super soon!

Ten seconds later, a little voice said “Hai!” and Evan peeked around the corner of the kitchen.

My heart totally stopped. My genius big-boy bed sleeping toddler was instead a genius room escaping (EVEN THOUGH there’s a child-proof cover on the door handle) toddler who managed to get out of bed and climb down the stairs in complete silence.  I am TERRIFIED of letting him climb down the stairs on his own so the thought of him doing the whole flight without anyone there to spot him almost made me pass out.

So. No more big boy bed until we get a gate for the stairs. And any recommendations for door handle covers that ACTUALLY KEEP CHILDREN FROM OPENING DOORS are appreciated.

Adorable bebehs in the adorable bed

Final room makeover results have been officially pushed back until we can take the crib down for good. I’m hoping some time before June.

He asked to have Caroline lie in bed. I think he’d sleep with her all the time if I’d let him.

Uh, ALSO needed: a way to make that outlet/cords a little less dangerous. Because right now I can imagine about 4000 ways he could kill himself either accidentally or because he’s a toddler and doesn’t seem to remember playing with outlets is danger! no matter how many times I scream it at tell him. Unfortunately, that’s the outlet that the light switch works not using it at all is the worst possible option. Well, worst besides some sort of terrible tragedy, so maybe not really WORST worst. I’m just hoping there’s a solution besides never having light in Little Evan’s room.

“OK Mom! Go away! We’re good without you!”

Yeah kid, that’s what YOU think.

I didn’t miss Little Evan’s monthday on Saturday, I was just too busy enjoying spending time with him this weekend to bother to sit down and write an update. He’s turning into a little person more and more every single day and it’s an amazing transition to watch. Just this week he found two of my vintage doll house people – the father and the little boy – and he’s been carrying them around making up pretend stories and adventures. They rode on cars and rode on the dog and sat in chairs and ate stuff and talked to each other. I named the father Joe and after Joe told Little Evan to be nice to his mommy Little Evan gave me a kiss. I think maybe next time Joe is going to tell him to pick up his toys, eat his vegetables, and take more naps.

Although really, naps aren’t our problem. Anytime between 11:30 am and 1:30 pm that he starts looking tired he’s more than happy to head upstairs for some shut-eye. A sippy cup of milk and a blankie are his only requests, although if I let him take a book to bed he’ll “read” it before he zonks out. Bedtimes are almost the same, but Daddy does bath and pj’s first. It’s nice to have at least one consistently easy toddler thing – and for it to be such a BIG thing – especially on days when everything else feels like a battle.

Speaking of battles, we’re currently in the middle of one involving food and how it is prepared/served. It all changes daily, which is beyond frustrating. The whole apple he loved yesterday gets thrown across the room today or the yogurt he was eating from the container 30 seconds ago is suddenly not good enough unless it’s in a BOWL. I have to let him choose his own utensils or nothing gets eaten at all. If I put the plate on the desk and he wanted to eat at the counter the meal is ruined. I try to be accommodating because I know he’s just trying to control one of the few things he can in his great big world but food isn’t optional. He HAS to eat. The worst part is I doubt “picky eating” is a phase that ends anytime soon.

Little Evan’s favorite things this month include the dog, the cats, his vintage wooden desk, his alphabet flashcards, sitting on the couch with mama or daddy, coloring with chalk, reaching things he’s not supposed to touch, and getting anyone who comes into the house to pick him up. His least favorite things include leaving anywhere he’s having fun, being told “no”, and sitting in the shopping cart. All those least favorites makes taking him on errands all sorts of challenging, so my evenings and weekends are now busy with those sorts of things.

I’m excited about Little Evan’s upcoming birthday but of course sad that his days of being 1 are numbered. 2 is going to be a whole new adventure!!

23 Month Milestones (from BabyCenter as usual)

Mastered Skills (most kids can do)
• Names simple picture in a book – Yes! He’s very good at this now, especially the books with animals. Maybe exclusively books with animals. I’m not actually sure we own any books that don’t contain animals.
• Uses 50 to 70 words – I never did get around to making a list of words but I would say we’re up to about 60 or 70 on a regular basis. Plus he’ll repeat almost anything and picks up new words on a daily basis.

Emerging Skills (half of kids can do)
• Opens doors – Yes, including our back door which is going to be a problem.
• Sings simple tunes – If by “simple tunes” you mean “the theme song to How I Met Your Mother or Battlestar Galactica”, then yes. In case you think I’m a horrible mother, he can also sing “Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes”. And several Ke$ha songs. Maybe I am a horrible mother.
• Takes more of an interest in playing with other kids – He has ALWAYS liked playing with other kids. He’s very good at sharing too, which always makes me a proud mama.

Advanced Skills (a few kids can do)
• Talks about self (likes, dislikes) – No. I’m not sure he even knows what he likes or dislikes. It changes on a minute by minute basis.
• Asks “why?” – Not yet. Can I add “thank god”?