I spent 3 hours and $900 on my minivan today, and if anyone had ever told me that would be my life 10 years ago I would have died.

Sunday:

Chalk markers changed my life.

She will literally sleep on any flat surface.

Bunk bed building buddies

Monday:

Good bye, see ya, I’m done here.

Matching princesses

My goal for Monday was to clean the new shared room. This was after THREE HOURS. We own too. Much. Stuff.

Tuesday:

Everyday I’m scooterin’

SO CLOSE TO SPRING. WE WERE SO CLOSE.

Peek-a-boo princess

Wednesday:

Hugging a beach ball

Hugging a different beach ball

Learning to dive is his MISSION IN LIFE

Thursday:

Go $#%& yourself, Winter

Birthday balloon update: Still mostly floating after 3 months.

Thursdays are exhausting

Friday:

Dress up and glitter slime playdate

Showing off the muscles he grew when he ate his whole sandwich

Saturday:

Warm up moves

She thinks having a blue tongue is the most AMAZING thing ever

Handsome

ONCE nice day this week and I’m ruined. I’ve lost my ability to handle the cold at all. I’m like a snake that shed its winter skin and all I can do is think about how nice and warm I would be if I lived in Florida or California or Hawaii.

Although right now I will accept 2 more weeks of cold as long as we can have beautiful, warm, sunny weather for Evan’s 5th birthday. The world of “these are your friends because I like their moms” and “these are my friends because I go to school with them” collided, and my guest list is a little out of control. Mostly that’s exciting, since this might be the first party Evan REALLY remembers and it’s going to be super fun. But also having all those people trapped in my house instead of using the porch/patio is going to be…well, horrible. It would be horrible.

Fingers crossed.

It appears these are the only posts I have in me right now. It’s a weird combination of being too busy and not at all busy. I spend a lot of time on my computer doing other things (photo editing, writing Glee recaps or trashy gossip stories for my new gigs, Facebook chatting, refreshing Facebook to make sure I haven’t missed any good Buzzfeed quizes) but none of that is interesting enough to blog about.

I’m also deep in pirate party planning mode for Evan’s birthday. I remember thinking I was a crazy person when I started planning his first birthday party (Circus party! Still one of my favorites) in January, but I think starting in March is even more crazy. So much to do in so little time!

Sunday:

It was so much easier to say “No, I’ll just have a salad” before they put a Five Guys in my town.

BEST KIND. Anyone who disagrees is just wrong.

Can I get 3 million shares on my blog post for taking this? No?

Monday:

Cute from the back…

…cute from the front.

Editing isn’t so bad when this is the baby you stare at for hours.

Tuesday:

Refusing to go to school until they see Idina & The Roots sing Let It Go

Basically heaven for a 3 year old

Yo ho let’s go!

Wednesday:

Somehow climbing in the snow is STILL fun for them

I am extremely jealous of their swim classes

I was conned into buying toddler Elsa because Caroline now recognizes “Sale” signs at Target

Thursday:

Why 3 year olds should not use mascara

Jaunty!

It’s crazy hair day every day in our house

Friday:

More pirates! it’s an invasion!

A rare look at the room I was attempting to “take back” from the children. It’s not going so well.

He insists on “swimming” in the bath now.

Saturday:

The friendliest koi fish ever

Tiny hipster children play cornhole at a brewery in an old mill. I can’t even.

That’s the cupcake happy dance

I am the only parent in the world who doesn’t actually hate springing forward. We don’t have anywhere to be until this afternoon, which means I got to sleep in even if the kids got up to play. Plus they’ve both been falling asleep on the couch at 6 pm, so I don’t think bedtime will be too hard. Basically, I am the worst.

I am sure I will pay for it later this week when they get up at 5:30 and paint my dining room table (again).

Right now I am sort of propped up sideways on the couch with an ice pack on my head and a hot pack under my left hip, because I am a) pregnant and b) a million years old. I had an amazing newborn session this morning but newborn sessions are basically like an extended workout – squat down, lean over, sit, stand up, reach out, lean the other way, etc etc etc – and most of my recent workouts have ended when I leaned over far enough to reach the remote. I have not been an active pregnant lady this time and I already regret it.

Sunday:

Princess dress #1

Princess Dress #2 (and possibly the sign of the Illuminati???)

Princess Dress/Jammies #3 (COVERED IN PAINT STAINS I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT)

Monday:

Pop Tart Face (sign of a parent dealing with more than they can handle)

Typical trip to the grocery store

Dressed appropriately for my ultrasound

Tuesday:

Mark it on the calendar: this week is officially The Week Caroline Discovered Hairstyles

A visit to the maternity ward for someone who wasn’t me

I miiiiight have a slight problem with blankets/props/wraps for newborns

Wednesday:

Even her “baby suit” is princess themed. DEDICATION.

The Day Evan Learned To Swim (and also balance on a foam duck)

The Day The Kids Learned You Can Get Icees Somewhere Other Than Target

Thursday:

It was crazy hair day at school, This was as crazy as he wanted to get.

So many animal friends

Bruno Mars was kind of terrifying on Sesame Street

Friday:

Best friends

Puppet show

Cuddle time

Saturday:

Ballet for Caroline, iPad for Evan

Totally unimpressed with these “flowers”

Actual, real hair cut. He looks 12 now.

After mainlining the whole first season of The Americans, I’m pretty convinced that everyone I know is secretly a spy. But luckily my only secret is how many boxes of Girl Scout cookies I’ve eaten today. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll totally kill anyone who reveals that number, but I don’t think it’s going to undermine national security.

I can’t believe it’s March.

I think it snowed again this week. I mean, it probably did. It never does anything else.

Sunday:

He’s a pro at iPading

This is basically every Sunday around here

Monday:

Dinosaur House

Sleeping dolls in a box are kind of creepy

I have this photo from every day. Caroline requests it.

Tuesday:

Let it go, let it go!

Snow in the house because I am the coolest mom

Naps for everyone!

Wednesday:

BACK TO SCHOOL

I hate youuuuuuuuuuu

She’s finally getting real hair instead of baby hair

Face in the water!

Thursday:

She insisted on helping

Singing at the school potluck

Twins

Friday:

Someone put herself down for a nap at 11 am

The dog hates thunderstorms, so she was helping him not be scared

DuckTales WOO OOO

Saturday:

So much chowder at the Chowder Cook Off (that’s clam/corn/sweet potato and spicy seafood)

SUPER EXCITED to be outside WITHOUT A COOOOOOAT

E’s new favorite place

It was 50 degrees this weekend and I got an adequate amount of vitamin D for the first time in months. Unfortunately all the out-and-about on Saturday was a lot on my poor pregnant hips so Sunday I just lay on the couch. Well, after laundry and cleaning and a baby’s 6 months mini-session. But BESIDES that, I took a really nice nap.

My 20 week ultrasound is Monday afternoon. It will be a test of my willpower if I can still report on Tuesday morning that we don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl. Considering how my willpower fared against 20 different kinds of chowder on Saturday (very poorly) I’m not totally hopeful.

Today’s surprising news: I’m not dead! I was certain I was about to be dead most of the weekend, thanks to the fountain of snot both coming out of my head and totally blocking my sinuses. If you’ve ever tried to use a netti pot and had the water come out your eye balls, you know why I was convinced of certain death. Today I am both not dead and well enough to be both hungry and bored, which is my normal state.

Sunday:

The most amusing game of duck, duck, goose I’ve ever witnessed.

Dinosaur heaven

Princess Anna give epic side-eye on House of Lies

Monday:

Totally obsessed with her veggiesaurus

My internet girlfriend/wife/best friend sent me a present. I did not share.

Signing his own valentine’s is HARD

Tuesday:

OMG THEY ACTUALLY HAD A SCHOOL DAY

This is the laundry chair, where I put the clean laundry. PLEASE NOTICE THE LACK OF LAUNDRY SITTING ON THE CHAIR.

In my next house, there will be separate tubs for children and relaxing

Wednesday:

Looking for Neverland

It’s the moooost wonderful tiiiiiiime of the yeeeeeear!!!

E finally got to eat his birthday cake

Thursday:

That iPad has totally paid for itself is mornings they did this instead of wake me up

The only family member still excited about snow

Snow days are exhausting

Friday:

The inmates are running the asylum.

CABIN FEVER

3 year old bath toes are cuter than mine

Saturday;

Trying to remember what a day WITHOUT snow looks like

If I HAD to be sick and unable to get off the couch, at least I picked the weekend House of Cards was released to do it.

Blushes judges me, but I finished season 2!

Today my goal is a) brush my hair and b) leave the house. I got (a) done at noon and I’m hoping to get (b) accomplished by going to see The Lego Movie later. Then maybe I can tackle harder things like “make dinner” or “unload the dishwasher”. I’m not pushing myself.