Posts Tagged ‘boat’

Sunshiny Days

Friday, September 7th, 2012

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I stopped taking my Zoloft back in June simply because I ran out. I kept meaning to make a follow up appointment to talk to my doctor about a refill, but as each day went by I felt better and warmer and happier and decided it was as good a time as any to stop. It wasn’t necessarily a smart, well thought out, medically advised decision. There was just so much going on – so many adventures, so many trips, so much SUNSHINE – that I forgot to make the appointment and before I knew it I was too busy to feel sad and frustrated and angry all the time.

It wasn’t an act of God or a miracle that I felt better. My anxiety reached an all-time high when Caroline was about 15 months old, which was exactly when we began weaning. A few people reached out to tell me they had experienced the same crazy hormone fluctuations and depression when they had stopped breastfeeding. It turns out it’s an actual thing, although not something that’s extremely well known.

The Zoloft got me through weaning and over that hormonal bump that made me feel like I was losing my mind. It was like a key and a sliver of light under the door I was banging my head against, trying to figure out how to escape my frustration.

Besides the medication, using hemp flower for anxiety  and the light (sunshine, brightness, longer days) made a huge difference. I used to roll my eyes at people who claimed Seasonal Affective Disorder with their sunlamps and their dread of winter. How can that be a real thing?

My apologies to everyone who I ever secretly thought was making it up, since there is no doubt in my mind that the short dark days played a huge part in my anxiety.

Maybe it’s an actual vitamin D deficiency or maybe it’s a feeling-the-sunshine-on-my-skin-makes-me-happy deficiency, but when the days warm up and we spend more time outside I am always better. A better mom, a better wife, a better person. The lightness makes me lighter.

With Labor Day weekend behind us the evenings getting shorter by the day and I’m starting to worry a little bit. September and October are beautiful, fun-filled months for us in New England. There’s still plenty of time to spend outside, plenty of apples to be picked, the perfect pumpkins to find for jack-o-lanterns, hay mazes to explore.

But beyond that, there’s winter. Cold. Dark. The stress of the holidays. Although December might be my very favorite month now (Caroline’s birthday AND Christmas!) there’s no doubt trying to split up family time and E’s crazy work schedule and weather-related delays and cancellations and ruined travel plans can crush my festive spirit pretty quickly. I’m feeling a little stressed just thinking about it. And the heating bill. And the snow. And now my eye is twitching.

I’m thinking I should probably go ahead and make an appointment now to talk to my doctor, rather than waiting until I get overwhelmed and the thought of adding one more thing to my plate makes me want to just curl up under the covers and cry. I don’t necessarily want to restart the Zoloft (or anything else) now. I’d like to be prescription free when we start trying for baby #3 if possible, although I’m also a little worried pregnancy could do what weaning did and things might get out of control again quickly. But I think it’s a good door to have open.

So for now I’m floating through the end of summer, mindful of what’s coming but not letting it overshadow these beautiful days. This weekend is the best weekend of the year around here (Greek Festival and Italian Food Festival within walking distance, town fair in our old town) and my biggest problem is we have too many friends to hang out with. It’s a pleasant kind of busy-ness, rather than the overwhelming kind. Let’s hope I can recognize the difference if and when it comes and know enough to ask for help.

I feel like this cat knows everything I wish I did about life.

My Week(96) in iPhone Photos

Saturday, September 1st, 2012

Our last week of summer went out with a bang (and a few naps).


This is her “I didn’t like anything all day but as soon as you tell me it’s time to go home I’m going to cry” face.


Thinking about how nice his mommy is for buying him an orange soda.


9:30 am

1 pm

Grape thief


One story before Daddy goes to work


This is how she feels about bubbles


Ready for some high bars

Searching for books about fire trucks, obvs

Mommy needed a rest from pushing the stroller up the hill on the way home, so we sat on someone’s steps.



We saw the amazing sunset…from the car.

Paleo fried rice is not actually rice – it’s cauliflower. I liked it, E did not.


Caroline insists Evan’s new fall sweatshirt is hers.

I wouldn’t mind bribing them so much if Caroline didn’t make THAT FACE.

Peek a boo! I have impetigo! Let me rub my face on you!


SNo one gets to sleep past 9 am in this house.

I’m on a boat!!

Aaaaand time for more naps.

E’s command realized that the guys were all pretty close to losing it with their crazy schedules, so they got the weekend off. I’m torn between over scheduling the crap out of all of us – the beach! the fair! walks! shopping! hayrides! – and just sitting on the couch for 48 hours watching Disney movies and letting the kids jump all over him. So far we’ve sort of split the difference – boats this morning, naps alllllll afternoon – and I’m loving it.

Did you take any camera phone photos this week? Link up with one or lots using the linky below and grab the code (so it shows on your blog too!) over at Amy’s . It’s really fun!

My Week(92) in iPhone Photos

Monday, August 6th, 2012

Actual BlogHer photo recap to come, since I took 700 pictures in 4 days (and my phone was totally dead by Sparklecorn so THOSE photos taken by other people will come even later)(although some of THOSE photos are going in my private never-to-see-the-light-of-day file).


As if I needed to point for you to see that giant canyon I have between my eyebrows. Maybe Botox wants to sponsor me.

Captain(s) Evan

I love a man who reads to his kids


Every trip to Target starts with the kids BEGGING to take this cart and ends with them screaming at me to get out

Mommy’s little helper



Caroline’s list of demands for BlogHer: Pony, Minnie Mouse, candy, dolly.

Mommy, I need balls! Balls, mommy! (for the cannon, obvs)

Library play time


Waiting at the train station to send me off

Riding in a cab makes me feel glamorous. I watched too much Sex and the City.



Blographer Event: Info gets a 9, food gets a 10.

I kept thinking I might run into Carson Daly, but then I remembered it’s not 1999.

I wish I was this talented


Learning high kicks from the experts – The Rockettes!

Just hanging out with Martha. NBD.

What, don’t all NY hotels have giant tropical fish tanks in the lobby?


Breakfast with Disney Jr. I don’t even think Disney is CAPABLE of doing something half-way.

Katie Couric is pretty much my hero.

Convenient location, crazy expensive food and drinks.

Holy cow am I tired. I went to NYC trying to fight off a cold and ended up with laryngitis. I can barely whisper. It’s making getting back to real life even more of a challenge – any minute the kids are going to realize I physically CAN’T yell at them for things and their reign of terror will begin. Thank GOD my mother-in-law kept the house stocked and clean so I can just play silent-movie trains and watch Disney Jr and drink 50 gallons of water today while I remember what real life feels like.

Did you take any camera phone photos this week? Link up with one or lots using the linky below and grab the code (so it shows on your blog too!) over at Amy’s . It’s really fun!

My Week(89) in iPhone Photos

Sunday, July 15th, 2012

Dear Summer,

Never end.

xoxo, Suzanne

Lazy boy, lazy dog nap

I made a fascinator out of leftover tutu tulle and a flea market pin. E thinks I’m ridiculous.

Don Draper, marry me. No wait, you’re an asshole.


Look Mom! I found a hypodermic needle! (Not really, just the most dangerous/poorly maintained playground I’ve ever seen.)

Checking to see if his ears are broken

C25K – I’m smiling out the outside but crying on the inside.


A few morning minutes of sleep thanks to PBS Kids

Snacks with their penguin friends

Who says knitting is a winter hobby?


Zoo animals looking at aoudads

Water painting at Hasbro’s Big Back Yard. AMAZING place.

Such a busy day…this looks like a good place for a nap.


Very classy breakfast

This is the first time Caroline ever noticed sand.

I heart gingers buttons, headed your way


He didn’t understand why I kept calling his football a soccer ball (cc: Elliot & Sara)

And lead me not into latte and cinnamon bun temptation…

…but deliver me into Week 3 Day 3 of running.


Family reading time

This is where E works aka his second family.

On the water is the best way to end a week

And now I have to go finish cleaning my kitchen because I have people coming over today to talk about blogging. We’re trying to get a super-local group going and I volunteered to host. I hope they bring wine and not too many questions, since I have no idea what I’m doing. I’ll have tons of haunted lighthouse pictures and a new recipe to post this week, plus one embarrassingly late set of fishing photos from our vacation in Virginia.

Did you take any camera phone photos this week? Link up with one or lots using the linky below and grab the code (so it shows on your blog too!) over at Amy’s . It’s really fun!

My Week(38) in iPhone Photos

Sunday, July 24th, 2011

Wow, internets, I’ve been ignoring you like crazy. But when it’s 104 degrees for a zillion days in a row, we’re too busy trying to keep cool and hiding in our air conditioned bedroom to do anything blog-worthy. I barely even took enough pictures to do my weekly post, but after THIRTY EIGHT weeks I’m not gonna miss one now!


My super glamorous life: reading books and pumping breastmilk

I let the cats out of the basement but it was too hot so they sulked around for an hour before going back down


Colored ice cubes at playgroup

Chubby leg nap

E is still taking a photography class, so he takes a lot of random pictures


Getting ready for our monthday photoshoot

Official spray bottle holder at Stroller Strides

Veggies at our CSA pickup


Getting ready for a day full of...nothing

This game is called "bebeh drive boat" and it is Little Evan's FAVORITE

Getting my craft on with beads and ribbon

Big girl can stand all by herself


North Lake, on the SubBase. It was PERFECT for the kids - Evan loved it.

Caroline loved the sand. Especially eating it.

So, I bought this. And I did it. It is...not so good. I'm hoping it fades.


What, don't you sleep with a tiny light saber?

Poor choices

I went to Hot Topic. I felt really, really old and uncool.

Whoever did this to the toys at the craft store is full of win.

Star Trek on the iPad, knitting myself a summer shawl. I am the world's most confused dork.


I got free deoderant from the internet.

Day on the boat included a trip to the secret marina in Gales Ferry

The marble game! We will teach you to play, but E will yell at you for doing it wrong.

We already had an adventure today involving sunflowers, a hayride and ice cream, and tomorrow E took the day off for a SUPER fun family trip. Tons of pictures coming soon, but right now I need a nap. Summer is exhausting!

Did you take any camera phone photos this week? Link up with one or lots using the linky below and grab the code (so it shows on your blog too!) over at Amy’s . It’s really fun!