I’ve always been an over-packer. I cannot leave a 60-mile radius around my house without outfits for the following situations: what if we go to the beach? what if it’s cold at night? what if we go out to dinner? what if we have to walk really far? what if a giant asteroid hits earth? what if Steven Spielberg suddenly falls out of the sky and says “You! If only you had a red shirt you’d be PERFECT for the lead role in my next film!”? So I tend to carry a lot of stuff.

All that previous packing was NOTHING compared to the amount of crap you need with a baby. We didn’t even spend the night away from home and we still brought an entire car full of baby stuff. There’s the car seat, the stroller, the diaper bag, the other diaper bag, the outfits & burp cloths (because I still have the spitty-uppiest baby in the world), the pack’n’play, the sling carrier, the mei tai carrier, the toys, the bouncy seat…wait, where’s the bouncy seat? Did we forget the bouncy seat?!?!  Luckily, E’s cousin has two kids and a garage full of abandoned baby gear which happened to include a swing. I seriously don’t know how people used to survive before Fisher-Price.

Our trip was to Plymouth, Mass – I’ve always felt that was an appropriate place to spend the 4th, very America-y – and we had a good time. The baby was about as well behaved as a three month old could be. He took a nice long nap in my new baby carrier while we walked around town. Unfortunately, now all the pictures of him in Plymouth look like this:

But he was very happy being carried and he didn’t get a sunburn and besides a little numbness in my left shoulder this morning the mai tei worked great. That’s us standing next to Plymouth Rock. I know, how exciting. A rock. You’re so jealous of our proximity to a random rock on a whole beach full of rocks that has been designated as the official rock the Pilgrims landed on even though it’s definitely not. Oh and someone vandalized it so instead of saying “1620” it says “1820”. So America just lost two hundred years of history. Great job, douchebag vandal.

Here are some pictures from the rest of our day:

I bought a status diaper bag. Did you even know there was such a thing?

I was planning to just buy a big purse but couldn’t resist. It’s a Petunia Pickle Bottom, a fancy baby bag designer (uh, bags FOR babies I mean – I doubt the designer is an actual baby). It came with four different kinds of straps, one of which is designed to attach to your Bugaboo stroller. This bag says “I am classy and stylish and the kind of mom who always brushes her hair”. Except that it was on clearance at TJMaxx so mine says “I am cheap and enjoy buying pants for $12”.

Yesterday went like this: bad, good, really good, bad, really bad, NAP, good, really really good, super fun good, sorta bad, really bad, OMG will the screaming never end bad, EIGHT HOURS OF SLEEP.

Since our Friday night plans got cancelled because of thunderstorms, we wanted to check out the Harbor Festival yesterday. Our town is celebrating it’s 350th anniversary and has been holding events for the past few weeks. They’re doing parties and lectures and walking tours of the mansions and gardens and there’s a tall ship down at the harbor and unfortunately I have made it to exactly zero events. As of today I have still attended zero, because I have a three month old. Baby Evan just didn’t give a crap that there were balloons! and pirates! and cotton candy! and a drum and fife band! None of those things interested him more than my boob, so with my handy nursing cover I fed him on a park bench. It went pretty well. It would have gone better if I’d had a pillow. Or if it hadn’t been a million degrees. Or if the drum and fife band hadn’t fired their muskets right when I got the baby latched on. causing him to almost rip my nipple off.

In the evening, we packed up the baby and some lemon bars and went over to E’s former co-workers for a cookout. We set up camp in the baby-corner with four other sets of parents and had a great time lying in the grass surrounded by kids and dogs and food. We made it two hours and one feeding before my back started screaming in pain and my head felt like it was going to explode. Baby Evan was grumpy from being awake for too many hours and once the yelling started I knew it wasn’t going to end. Although he napped in the car on the way home, he was too hungry to sleep for long and I spent the rest of the evening nursing him almost constantly to keep him from wailing.  At 11 pm I gave up and turned him over to E hoping I could get a couple hours of rest. At 7 am I woke up and found both my boys had slept in the living room and I had gotten EIGHT HOURS of sleep for the first time in 12 weeks. I needed it. Today we’re going to do nothing structured and just let baby (and E) nap as much as he wants.

Pictures:

Baby Evan’s outfit is a hand me down from when my brother (now 20) was a baby.

Using my nursing cover.

Baby, blanket and beer at the cookout. E even wore the sling for a while, despite some of the guys giving him crap. It made the other moms really jealous of my awesome husband.

There’s a Huggies ad campaign currently running with the tag line “enjoy the ride”. They want new parents to sign up for their rewards program (I’m guessing it’s just like the Pampers rewards I signed up for – buy a zillion and one diapers, get a $5 gift certificate for photo prints). In magazines the ads are pictures of hassled parents trying to juggle strollers and cell phones or trying to change diapers in the dark or something. There’s also a tv spot featuring what I’m sure is some casting director’s ideal version of a “hip, urban” mom – African-American, obvious tattoos, NYC-style apartment – trying to potty train her daughter. I’m sure the disposable diaper companies are losing this kind of parent in droves due to the popularity of the new cloth diapers and this campaign is an attempt to regain that market share. Be hip, use Huggies!

But if I was in charge, I’d fire that advertising agency immediately. One of the ads on tv has a “funny” disclaimer at the end. I’m sorry I can’t find the video online but considering they play it a hundred times a day I hope you’ve already seen it. The disclaimer says something like “To be eligible for Huggies rewards you must go through nine months of morning sickness and people touching your belly. Then you must be rushed to the hospital where you will experience…a miracle!”

Really Huggies? Really? Only people who have given birth need diapers? How about the thousands of families who come together through adoption. I’m sorry, parents who opened their hearts to a baby that isn’t biologically related to them, you can’t participate. Hope you got one that was already potty trained! And I sure hope you didn’t use a surrogate since your “miracle” will be happening to someone else. No rewards for you! Just to be safe, you better watch out for those step-kids too. Can’t let them go thinking they’re the same as REAL children!

There are many, many ways to become a family Huggies, and your insistence that one go through pregnancy to be a parent is ridiculous. If I didn’t already hate your diapers I’d be switching brands.

How cute is all this stuff? I mean, it’s not Odeedoh hip and modern but with the really blue walls and the awesome shiny floors I think I can get away with cheap Babies R Us and Target decor.

I need to move the baby swing and carrier downstairs, but since I don’t need them in my living room right now I’m using the baby room as storage.

This bedding set is even cuter in the room than it was online. I love that I can buy stuff that “matches” but isn’t meant as nursery decor.

Next up: one more bookcase, lighting, curtain rods and a box to cover the radiator.