Dear Mr. Santa(1),
Although I know Baby Evan must have told you “All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth(2)”, I would really appreciate a Silent Night(3) at some point during The Twelve Days of Christmas(4). Between the teething and his insane level of hatred for the pack’n’play, I’m totally exhausted and can’t help but wonder What Child is This(5) who keeps torturing me. As soon as we lay him down in the baby cage-I mean, the playpen- he wakes up no matter how sound asleep he was previously and cries like we just told him Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer(6). Although I’m very excited for his first real Christmas morning tomorrow, I’m afraid all the Jingle Bells(7) and your reindeer Up On The Rooftop(8) tonight might make it even more difficult than usual to get him to sleep. I know you’re in a hurry to bring Joy to the World(9) but if you could try and be extra quiet I would really appreciate it. And while you’re in the area, could you check on that BabyHawk I’m supposed to be getting soon? I wish I had know Last Christmas(10) how awesome baby-wearing is so I could have asked for carriers before I gave birth, but getting one this year will definitely make it a Happy Christmas(11). Really, I’m just so happy to be Home for the Holidays(12) this year that anything you could bring me will just be icing on the cake (frosting on the cookie?) If you happen to see Baby Jesus Away in the Manger(13) tell him “hi” from our family and thanks for the White Christmas(14).
*Sorry y’all, I’m feeling super cheesey this Christmas Eve and am doing all my posting from an iPhone this week so the typos may be worse than usual (see how I just casually mentioned my fancy new phone without being all braggy and annoying? And then see how I totally ruined it by adding this aside? And aren’t you both jealous and hating me a little bit right now?) Safe travels, Merry Christmas, and may the joy of the season be felt by you and your loved ones.*