Hospital Safety

My hospital has a Baby Lojack system. No, really. All babies get an ankle bracelet with an electronic chip in it. If someone tries to take the baby out of the birthing center, all the door automatically lock down and an alarm goes off. I’m happy to know no one will be wandering off with my newborn, but being trapped in that one wing of the hospital for several days might drive me to “test” their system.

In addition to the ankle bracelet, the baby nursery is locked at all times, you aren’t allowed to carry a baby around outside your room unless it’s in the hospital bassinet, and everyone – baby, mom and dad – get matching serial numbers on a wristband. The nurses check the numbers on a regular basis to make sure you’ve got YOUR baby.

My birthing instructor assured us that this hospital has never had any “accidents” with missing or stolen babies. I was tempted to ask how one “accidentally” steals a baby but didn’t want to be a smart ass to anyone who could potentially be involved with my future pain relief.

7 Responses to “Hospital Safety”

  1. Tash says:

    Baby: You are under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law.

  2. Other Erin says:

    I think the accident is more like “Hey, you know how you love that 16 year old? The one whose diapers you changed and whose abuse you took while it was going through puberty? Turns out that’s Baby Smith. Sorry!”

  3. Erin (i dont have a fake name :( ) says:

    Wouldn’t it be easier if they just let you keep your own baby in the room with????

    And if you wanted to steal a baby couldn’t you just cut off the bracelet???

  4. bebehblog says:

    The babies DO stay in your room, but if they go to the nursery for tests or if you want a break to sleep or take a shower or something.

    And the bracelets are like the ankle monitoring device they put on criminals – a little harder to get off than just a plastic band.

  5. AGreenEyeDevil says:

    From a blunt business perspective no birthing center can risk their reputation w/the abduction or identity mix-up of a baby. This is a litigation and malpractice NIGHTMARE! Their techniques are also a savvy marketing element to practicing OBs and their patients. It sounds as though you will be giving birth in the Fort Knox of L&Ds!! I think this is a very good thing.

    From a physiological perspective, the hormonal changes being endured by a woman in this time frame are significant. It’s not uncommon for many women to have great anxiety and focus on the security of their infant. The Fort Knox approach lets the staff honestly assure the mother of a secure environment.

  6. But does it come with a year-long subscription to their services? That would be kind of awesome.

  7. Brigit says:

    This system sounds really cool!
    There are already monitoring baby bracelets that let you know where your child is, if your child has been taken out of your previously authorized area, or if some unauthorized person has removed the bracelet. Or at least according to Brink.

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