(Lincoln 11 months, Caroline 11 months, Evan 11 months)

I have a great big talky, walky baby. Well, not really talking. He makes a lot of talking noises and babbles non-stop. But the walking is ridiculous. Caroline got him to walk the full lap around the first floor, up and down the transition step and everything. He cannot be stopped. He gets into everything, touches everything, reaches everything, spills everything. I have to pin him down for diaper changes and won’t even sit down to nurse – he stands up.

Finnegan is still pretty bald, so it’s hard to tell if he’s going to be Team Blonde or Team Ginger. The bald look makes him seem babyish still, which is fine with me. He can look like a chubby little baby as long as he wants. I’m not ready for him to be a toddler, even if he spends most of his time toddling around.

Finn takes one nap a day, usually around noon, but will take a second one later if we are in the car for any reason. He goes to bed about 8 pm and sleeps until about 8 am, which means I am finally getting 7 hours of sleep a night and my stress level is significantly lower. If I went to be right after the kids there’s a chance I could get TEN HOURS in a row. I’m not even sure that’s physically possible.

He’s wearing 12-18 month clothes (or 2T shorts if they’re not stretchy) but 6-12 month shoes, because he has tiny feet and huge thighs. It’s truly amazing he can even stand up, let along walk. He still isn’t a fan of things on his head but he will sometimes let me tie on a hat if it’s really sunny outside. He loves being outside, especially on my back in a baby carrier. Once the weather cools down I’m looking forward to wrapping him instead of always using the buckle carrier. I’ll be down to just Finnegan in the mornings, so  we’ll have lots of time to practice using our woven wraps and just wandering around the neighborhood. Or Target. Probably Target.

We’re celebrating both Finnegan turning 1 and Lincoln turning 3 with a joint birthday in mid-August. Our summer schedule was too busy for me to commit to 2 separate parties, but I couldn’t bring myself to not throw any party at all. The themes is children’s books. Finnegan is also having a children’s book smash cake photo session done by our awesome photographer who did his newborn pics. Considering how much he loves eating, I’m hopeful he loves the smash cake with his whole face.

Likes include food, more food, any food, all the food, cuddles, being upside down, nursies, tickles, his brothers, his sister, walking, the trash can, stealing things, chewing on crayons, climbing stuff, doing gymnastics, his blankie, naps, sand, grass, smiling, the cat, the dog, and mama.

Dislikes include being very tired, sitting in the car if it’s not moving, when I leave the room and when people won’t share their food.

11 Month Milestones 

Mastered Skills (most kids can do)
Says “mama” or “dada” to the correct parent – Calls me mama sometimes, Says dadadadada.
Plays patty-cake and peek-a-boo – Peek-a-boo yes, and it’s hilarious
Stands alone for a couple of seconds – Walks.
Cruises – Walks.

Emerging Skills (half of kids can do)
Understands “no” and simple instructions – Understands no, does not obey no.
Puts objects into a container – Only to be annoying. Like throwing the same block into my lap 50 times or trash in my coffee.

Advanced Skills (a few kids can do)
Says one word besides “mama” or “dada” – Bababababa but that’s not a word.
Stoops from standing position – He practices he squats like it’s leg day every day.

So if month 1 is an exhausted blur, month 4 you start to get the hang of things, and month 6 is when you can start buying them all the good toys, month 8 of baby care is when you no longer remember what sitting down feels like. In the past 24 hours, Baby Evan has:

– Eaten a piece of yarn
– Fell on the cat
– Pulled the recycling can over on top of himself
– Dumped all the dog food out of the bowl
– Ripped up a roll of wrapping paper
– Fallen on his head at least four times
– Hit himself in the face with the baby swing
– Hit me in the face with a baby hammer
– Pinched his hands under the rocking chair
– Tried to put a knitting needle through his ear
– Climbed onto the bottom shelf of the changing table and threw everything on it on the floor

And all of that was before E got home from work. At 2 pm. I picked the wrong month to (re)give up Diet Coke…unless I’m planning to replace it with speed. Or maybe breastmilk, because apparently it makes you super strong – the better to hit you in the face my dear – and super fast – the better to escape the confines of the baby gate. This afternoon while I was unloading the car Baby Evan actually managed to push the back door open a couple inches and was seconds away from falling right out onto the (cement) back porch face first. As much as I DON’T love his sharp little baby teeth, I think it’s better if we keep them intact for at least a few more years. He may actually need them for eating something someday. Not now, or tomorrow, or probably next week, but some day. I mean, he can’t exclusively nurse forever, right? NO baby has ever survived entirely on breastmilk until kindergarten…right? RIGHT??

So besides the violent puking, thrashing, gagging and general crankiness regarding solid food (or really, anything besides milk straight from the boob – still no bottles, cups, spoons, shot glasses or straws either) let’s see how he’s hitting his 8 month milestones:

Mastered Skills (most kids can do):
• Says “mama” and “dada” to both parents (isn’t specific) – No, not really. We’ve both heard “dada” or “daddy” but nothing even close to mama, unless High Pitched Screeching Velociraptor Noise is what he plans to call me.
• Passes objects from hand to hand – Check.

Emerging Skills (half of kids can do):
• Stands while holding onto something – Lord does he ever, and he gets there on his own. The couch, the chair, the rocker, my leg, his play table, the baby gate, the handle on the stove, the dishwasher, your mom. Anything.
• Crawls – He finally got the hang of real crawling, which means my plan to tape a Swiffer cloth to his stomach is out.
• Points at objects – Meh? He reaches, but there’s no actual finger pointing.
• Searches for hidden objects – Do immaginary objects count? He is totally convinced I am hiding something WONDERFUL and DELICIOUS under the rug and one of these days he is definitely going to find it.

Advanced Skills (a few kids can do):
• Pulls self to standing, cruises – See above for “pulls self up”. But he’s finally got the hang of cruising, although sometimes he forgets he has to move BOTH legs and unintentionally ends up doing a very impressive center split.
• Picks things up with thumb-finger pincer grasp – Then shoves them in his mouth, then throws up. Really awesome.
• Indicates wants with gestures – Not so much “gestures” as EAR-PIERCING SCREAMS. I took the disgusting car keys he was gnawing on away from him in Target yesterday and the noise he made sounded so much like the fire alarm he almost cleared the building. I hope he gets the hang of gestures soon.

Speaking of gestures, I’ve been meaning to watch that Baby Signs DVD my friend Amanda let me borrow and get started on making Baby Evan into a genius child. Or at least a child who understands the word “no” or “danger” or “for the love of GOD STOP PUTTING THAT IN YOUR MOUTH”. I felt a little silly signing to a baby that clearly didn’t understand the difference between actual sign language and crazy hand waving, but at this point I think I need to either really make an effort or just forget about it all together. I should at least teach him the sign for “nurse” – he’s GOT to understand that one at this point.