I’m late again, but it wasn’t my fault this time, I was having laptop issues and my iPhone photos wouldn’t load. I know you were really concerned.

Sunday:

Annual Nutcracker Conference

You’re “welcome”.

Teaching the children naval dominance

Monday:

Pretty pleased with his own driving skills

THE FORCE AWOKE

We play a lot of cards in Ohio

Tuesday:

Child-sized hamster run was quite entertaining

No caption needed

HEY GUYS I FOUND OUTSIDE

Wednesday:

The doc is in and she’ll fix you up…

Drive thru banking is so convenient

This is what happens when I want Linc to pose for a picture

Thursday:

Cousin Christmas is a little crazy

Trouble face

More cards

Friday:

Out?

I forgot to bring my phone inside COSI, but it was REALLY fun

Disco sparkle tree

Saturday:

So many pine needles

Post-Christmas disaster house

Post-Christmas ER trip for some face-gluing

I got both big kids out the door and off to school on time with no crying and no screaming, so reintroduction to real life is going pretty well. It’s currently softly snowing outside while I drink coffee and watch Lincoln destroy the house I already cleaned once today, so my day is going well. That’s not sarcasm, that’s a perfectly lovely day with a 17 month old.

I went a little crazy signing the kids up for activities (again) because bored kids trapped in a cold house are the worst, so this week is going to be B U S Y. Let’s hope they wear themselves out too much to whine, since I am all full up of whining children after 2 weeks off school.

Late late late late late. But we spent ALL day Sunday out of the house and I spent all day today finishing all my photography stuff so I am completely caught up! Now maybe I can blog this week! Or maybe I’ll just say that and not do it again. That seems more likely.

Sunday:

Waiting in the ER is a lot easier with technology

Not impressed with my wrap skills or the tape on his head.

I am not the only one who loves wraps

Monday:

I sold this one, pretty much thanks to this picture

Beautiful evening light…at 3 pm.

CHEEKS

Tuesday:

Yes mother, that is a very nice fancy teether. Now if only I knew how to PUT IT IN MY MOUTH.

I can’t be mad about the mess when they’re practicing their words

Brother time

Wednesday:

I was too sick to wear the baby, so we did the grocery-pile-on-the-carseat method

All we did. All day.

My mail lady leaves treats for the dog

Thursday:

One of the last buildings left at the old hospital is being torn down (taken from a stopped car at a stop light, I’m not dumb enough to do it while driving).

Back floats

I am the worst, because I forgot the iPad and she had to just SIT while her brother had swim.

Friday:

Parenting win: taking the kids to a friend’s house to let them bounce while I watch from inside the warm house.

Then the friends came over for pizza and wine. NAILED IT, FRIDAY NIGHT.

DUCK JAMS

Saturday:

Never ending Halloween candy

Linc found his toes

One last sleeping baby

I spent a LOT of time under that baby this week. Usually I try to get stuff done while I sleeps but I felt TERRIBLE for the first half of the week and was busy catching up and seeing friends the second half, so nothing got done. Thank God for antibiotics and Netflix. I cannot believe it is already the second week of November. I refuse to do anything Christmasy until after Thanksgiving, but now I’m worried I’ll wake up and it will suddenly be mid-December and I won’t even have noticed. Why is 2014 going so fast?!

Here is a timeline of our weekend.

3 pm Friday: E calls to tell me he might not be able to come with us to Sesame Place for the weekend.

6 pm Friday: E calls to tell me he can PROBABLY come with us but not until 11 am on Saturday.

7 am Saturday: E calls to tell me he probably isn’t going to make it.

9 am Saturday: E calls to tell me he definitely isn’t going to make it so I should just take the kids and go. I make vague “Oh I don’t know…maybe we should just cancel…” noises but decide to go because I already paid for the hotel.

10 am Saturday: We hit the road!

10:10 am Saturday: We come home, because I forgot our season passes!

10:15 am Saturday: We re-hit the road!

10:30 am – 1:00 pm Saturday: The kids sleep almost the whole way, there’s no traffic, I only get a tiny bit lost and we make it to the park right as they open for the afternoon.

1:15 pm – 8:00 pm Saturday – Super good fun time at Sesame Place!

8:10 pm Saturday – Drive across the street to super nice hotel.

9:00 pm Saturday – Everyone is in jammies and in bed, but my migraine is horrible.

9:01 pm – 10:30 pm Saturday – Caroline coughs, I cough, Caroline coughs, I cough, Caroline coughs, I cough, Caroline coughs, I cough, Caroline coughs, etc etc etc. Eventually we both coughed ourselves to sleep.

Midnight – Evan starts coughing so hard he throws up. I clean him up and get him a glass of water. He throws up into the glass of water. I get a new towel to clean him up again. He throws up again and I manage to catch it all on the towel. “Wow, nice catch Mommy!” says Evan.

12:30 am Sunday – Evan falls back asleep.

4:00 am Sunday – I wake up with my migraine pounding.

6:00 am Sunday – Caroline wakes up ready to party.

7:30 am Sunday – I decide I need a shower to relax and help my head. Caroline decides she needs to stand right outside the shower and scream.

7:40 am Sunday – I let Caroline join me in the shower so she’ll stop crying. She screams some more, rubs soap in her eyes, then tries to climb out of the tub and falls RIGHT on her chin.

7:41 – 7:42 am Sunday – Caroline bleeds on every surface in the hotel room while I frantically try to get dressed, stop the bleeding, and text my friend Kim to see if she can help me throw stuff in the car to find an emergency room.

7:45 am Sunday – Kim insists on taking Evan, I head to the nearest ER which amazingly shares a parking lot with our hotel.

8:30 am Sunday – Caroline attempts to give herself a stroke screaming her head off while the doctor gives her 3 stitches in her chin.

8:31 am Sunday – All the blood drains from my head, I start to feel hot and I ask the nurse helping me hold Caroline down if I can sit for a minute. She looks at me and says “OH MY GOD, SIT DOWN.”

8:32 am Sunday – I slump into a chair right as I lose consciousness. I wake up to a cup of water for me, apple juice for Caroline and some concerned looked medical staff.

8:40 am – 9:00 am Sunday – Caroline and I snuggle on the hospital bed until we both feel better, then head back to the hotel.

9:30 am Sunday – Caroline and I get some breakfast while Evan swims in the pool with Kim and her boys.

10:00 am Sunday – I decide we won’t be sticking around to do more Sesame Place and we head home.

2:00 pm Sunday – Home. Mickey Mouse on TV. I take 3 Excedrin and lie on the couch.

3:30 pm Sunday – E gets home and orders pizza. I basically give up on parenting and let the kids run wild.

7:00 pm Sunday – BED.

Basically, it was like a nightmare wrapped in a puke-covered towel, covered in screaming.

Except that really…it wasn’t that bad. The drive to Sesame was nice and easy. We were all dressed warmly and no one was whiny. The park wasn’t very busy and the kids got to ride lots of rides and see plenty of characters. We got to hang out with Kim and her mom and her wonderful boys. Even though we were all cough-y, Evan slept through my coughing and Caroline slept through Evan’s puking. Evan went right back to sleep after he got sick. No one complained to the hotel about our noise levels. Caroline handled her injury really well and didn’t seem to be in a lot of pain. The ER was so close, almost empty and everyone was super nice. The doctor took one look at Caroline, said “Yep, stitches” and immediately got the nurse in to get stuff started. She’ll be better by Friday and have her stitches out before her birthday party. She won’t have a big ugly scar.  I didn’t hurt myself fainting. Thanks to my awesome friend Kim, Evan got to swim and have fun with his friends instead of spend the morning in the ER with me. Our drive home was pleasant and easy and traffic-free. I got pizza for dinner.

So in the end, despite the various…disasters, we had a nice weekend. The kids had fun. Caroline has totally forgotten her chin. I didn’t freak out. It didn’t scare me into never leaving the house again. On Monday, I packed up the kids and drove 45 minutes to a super-awesome kids museum. Then we ate lunch in a sit-down restaurant with friends. We had a lovely day and I already think the whole thing is funny.

It sort of feels like a win, which is something pre-kid Suzanne would NEVER call a weekend that involved cleaning up so many other people’s bodily fluids. Motherhood is crazy.

I was going to have a post today of pictures from our local holiday parade. Nothing fantastic, but some cute small town Connecticut stuff.

Instead, let me tell you about how I fainted Monday morning and landed directly on my face-parts. BAM. Left eye, nose, forehead, I’d like you to meet floor. Then I spent the day on the couch feeling sorry for myself and putting frozen peas on my swollen eye instead of editing photos (or writing the other two giveaway posts I have coming up).

I have no idea why I fainted, although this isn’t the first time I’ve lost consciousness sort of randomly. I can name maybe 6 or 7 times in my life it’s happened, dating back to 4th or 5th grade. It’s usually right after I hurt myself, although “hurt myself” can mean anything from slamming my finger in the door to having outpatient surgery on my, uh, delicate areas. Yesterday morning I had a really sharp – being stabbed with a knife sharp – pain in my stomach for a split second right before I fell over. I don’t even remember the falling part, just waking up slowly and realizing something was wrong, mostly because my face really hurt and I wasn’t wearing pants.

Evan had come in either right as I fell or right after and he was pretty freaked out, as I expect any kid would be if their mom was unresponsive. The adrenaline rush from passing out combined with the pain of my face smash combined with thinking about how much worse it could have been if I hit my head on something harder or pointier resulted in a few minutes of sobbing, but I pulled myself together enough to get everyone downstairs, fed, and safely watching cartoons (even if Caroline never made it out of her pajamas).

E (unfortunately) had to go into work for a while but (fortunately) made it home for dinner, bedtime, and to nag me about going to the ER to get checked out. My face felt worse and worse so eventually I gave in just to make sure I hadn’t fractured my eye socket or driven a piece of bone into my brain or some other horrible, terrifying medical condition I found thanks to Dr. Google. Four hours later I know I am 100% healthy, apart from the sore face and a lot of embarrassment. I am also DEFINITELY not pregnant. I’m supposed to drink more water and “take it easy” but since my discharge papers didn’t come with a babysitter OR a housekeeper I can only take it sort of easy.

If you see me in the next couple of days, try to refrain from cringing in horror at my face, at least any more than usual. It’s pretty bad and hurts too much to cover with anything besides a pair of big sunglasses. I’m just happy we took our Christmas card pictures LAST week.

p.s. Confidential to my friend Megan: I’m sorry I bailed on our plans and told you I was “sick”. I was still too embarrassed to explain the face thing at  8 am. I hope you understand.

p.p.s. Today is the LAST DAY to enter to win the Tollytots prize package, so if you haven’t checked it out yet GO! NOW!

My week was going really well until Caroline’s accident on Friday. (In case you missed my Tweets/FB updates/Instagrams she fell at the playground and broke her collar bone.) It was pretty traumatic for all of us. It’s also put a damper on our fall plans, our playdate schedule and Caroline’s budding gymnastics career. Poor thing. So we’re taking things easy and cruising right through our Disney DVD collection.

Sunday:

He insisted my boots fit him just fine.

We made it to church! And it didn’t burn down or anything!

I love this stroller but it REALLY NEEDS A CUP HOLDER.

Monday:

MORNING toothbrushing? Whose children are these?

Lion fish are badass

Hi Beluga, I love you.

Tuesday:

Sewing helper! Tuesday was GET THIS DAMN COSTUME DONE Day.

Mostly done…

…THERE’S my magical pixie!!

Wednesday:

Color matching uneven bars foot bean bag toss – he rocked it.

BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY – Caroline

He transferred from a car nap to a couch nap that lasted 3 hours. I have NO IDEA why.

Thursday:

Easily distracted by things in the dirt

22 lb baby vs. 10 lb kettle bell. She is SO STRONG.

Scenic, tragic waterfall

Friday:

I took a picture to commemorate NOT wearing yoga pants.

That slide in the background is what she fell off the top of, 2 minutes after I took this photo.

Sponge Bob in the ER – I hate the damn show but it certainly kept Evan quiet for 2 hours.

Saturday:

The patient demanded a popsicle for breakfast, the patient gets a popsicle.

Tired from a day of doing…nothing.

Cheerful enough for a bath. Thank goodness, she was covered in popsicle.

So if you need me, I’ll be over here feeling like the world’s worst mom. Good times.

Did you take any camera phone photos this week? Link up with one or lots using the linky below and grab the code (so it shows on your blog too!) over at Amy’s . It’s really fun!