Reasons I have not taken a shower today
1. I was planning to work out first.
2. You’re only supposed to wash your hair, like, twice a week anyways.
3. I used all the hot water on the laundry.
4. My “natural” scent helps the baby bond with me.
5. Something about the environment.
6. I cleaned the bathroom this morning and can’t bring myself to get it dirty.
7. The shower is upstairs and the baby is sleeping in the swing downstairs and I can’t hear the monitor over the sound of the shower.
8. I can put a hat over my greasy hair but not over my disgusting floors.
9. Babies don’t can’t if you’ve shaved your legs this week month.
10. I am just plain old lazy.