No Deal

Sorry there was no post yesterday, but I was too busy STANDING IN LINE FOR EIGHT HOURS. Deal or No Deal (aka Opening Random Boxes with Howie Mandel) held an open casting call at Foxwoods Casino, which happens to be less than 7 miles from my house.

So my thought process went like this “Hey, I don’t have anything else to do. I could really use $500,000. It’s Connecticut, how many people can possibly show up? The casino has air conditioning so spending a few hours there is better than sitting in the sweat box that is my house. I’ll just pop the baby in the sling and we’ll breeze right through”

Here’s what happened: EIGHT HOURS OF STANDING. 7,000+ people. I held the baby in the sling or in my arms the entire time. I ate exactly nothing and drank 1 bottle of water. When we got to the front of the line, a casting director gave me 20 seconds to talk about myself and then sent me home. I made a stupid joke about how when I got in the line I was still pregnant. I don’t think he was impressed. I forgot all the clever things I was going to say and had a boring answer for “What would you do with the money?” I am much funnier and more clever on the internet than I am in person. Don’t bother watching for me on NBC at 4 pm.

Here’s what else happened: Baby Evan was ah-maze-ing. He took three naps and nursed twice. The nice people around me held my place in line so I could go find a chair (or a quiet corner) to feed him and change him. No one said a damn word about a nursing baby in a casino and several people had polite conversation with me and had no idea he was attached to my boob. He made approximately 500 new friends and was called “SUCH A CUTE BABY” 40,000 times. Random strangers begged to hold him. He did not scream. He did not cry. He only threw up a tiny normal baby sized amount. I think he had a pretty good time. The best part was just how much it reinforced in my mind that my parenting choices were working and I am raising a happy, social, well adjusted baby.

If I do get to open some random boxes I will totally be plugging this blog on national tv and then fill it full of ads for $700 high chairs and Gucci baby shoes. But don’t worry, I’ll remember you from when I was still unknown and send you a coupon for 10% off.

Related posts:

Go Fit Yourself.
Wisdom from the Greatest Generation. Or from an email. Whatever.
Is it spring yet?

5 Responses to “No Deal”

  1. lalaland13 says:

    Aww honey that sucks. I’m sorry. And considering what a freakish guy Howie is, if you did get on, he’d probably be all “SHE HAS A BABY! GERMS! RUN AWAY, HOWIE!” He’s an odd one. On the bright side, he might be so freaked out he would just start throwing suitcases of money at you.

    I’ve thought of trying to be on Who Wants To Be a Millionaire, but I’d probably freeze up on TV. Also, Slumdog Millionaire was kind of overrated.

  2. Spaceman Bill Leah says:

    OMG! I love Deal or No Deal (The People Shouting at Boxes n’ Moddles Hour). I hope you do get cast so I can tell people I know some one who was on the show. Sort of.

  3. […] it seems like you need a lot of dumb luck more than anything. Which is why my friend over at Bebeh Blog had to wait in line with her baby for so long, he had hit puberty by the time she got up there. […]

  4. […] old and I’ve used it at least twice a week every since. It’s the carrier I wore while I stood in line for 8 hours auditioning for Deal or No Deal. I keep it in the car for quick runs into the store. It’s great for shopping or walking […]

  5. […] old and I’ve used it at least twice a week every since. It’s the carrier I wore while I stood in line for 8 hours auditioning for Deal or No Deal. I keep it in the car for quick runs into the store. It’s great for shopping or walking […]

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